IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Most high level positions in companies are filled by men even though the work space in many developed countries is more than 50% female. Companies should be require to allocate a certain percentage of these position to women. Do you agree?

#level #positions #companies #men #work #space #countries #percentage #position #women
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In most cases, It is widely seen that organizations are biased when it comes to women empowerment or promoting them to executive level
position
. In my opinion, I firmly believe that the organizations should be compelled to reevaluate their policies and create equal opportunities for both men and women. In
this
 fast paced world, women are equally competitive as that of men mainly in every domain. They are academically strong and are outperforming men in every subject. Women, In
this
 era, put strenuous efforts to grasp top
position
 during their studies which make them capable and competent enough to lead from the front,
For example
, In the west, women are dominating in every field of study. They are contributing in science, law, medicine, technology and proving themselves as a very valuable asset for the nation as well as for the organization at every step. Not only academically, they are even good at those skills that are often considered as mandatory to reach to an executive
position
 in an organization. They are outspoken, they posses good communication skills, they are good in management and above all they have relentless determination towards their work. It is
therefore
 an erroneous assumption that women are not a good option for an executive level
position
 in a company. Arduous journey of women cannot be sidelined.
Therefore
, the organizations should heed the core points mentioned above and should take immediate action to allocate the top
position
 equitably between men and women,
This
 would incentivize other women to perform well and will create a very competitive environment within an organization.
Submitted by usmaan.siddiquii1 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: