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Writing Samples
Band 4

The graph below shows the quantities of goods transported in the UK between 1974 and 2002 by four different modes of transport. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the quantities of goods transported in the UK between 1974 and 2002 by four different modes of transport. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
In
Change preposition
From
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 1974-2002, there are four different modes of transport used in transporting
goods
Use synonyms
 in the UK. These modes of transport are by road, water, rail and pipeline. Using
pipeline
Fix the agreement mistake
pipelines
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 is more constant because
million
Correct article usage
the million
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 tonnes of
goods
Use synonyms
 are increasing steadily between 1978-1982 and 1990-1998. The rest of the year is constant.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, when using rail
line
Fix the agreement mistake
lines
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 is more tricky because
through
Add the comma(s)
,through
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 the years,
goods
Use synonyms
 are decreasingly fluctuating. But in 1995, it is starting to increase until
in
Change preposition
apply
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2002. Another constant in transporting
goods
Use synonyms
 is when using shipping by water. Between 1981-1992, the
goods
Use synonyms
 transported are the dame in
amount
Add an article
the amount
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 of million tonnes with a very
difference
Replace the word
different
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 with each other.
Lastly
Linking Words
, transporting by road is
also
Linking Words
 effective even though there are times that
goods
Use synonyms
 transported decrease, but will increase rapidly for approximately 4 years range. In conclusion, using pipelines and
by
Change preposition
apply
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water is the most constant in transporting
goods
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
 using rail lines
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 more complicated and using
road
Add an article
the road
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are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 the most successful.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words goods with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "go" was used 7 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "go" was used 7 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Overview
  • Trend
  • Fluctuation
  • Peak
  • Trough
  • Increase
  • Decrease
  • Stability
  • Mode of transport
  • Quantity
  • Comparison
  • Goods
  • Transported
  • Significant
  • Noticeable
  • General trend
  • Time span
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