IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The chart and table below give information about population figures in Japan. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart and table below give information about population figures in Japan. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #population #figures #japan #summarise #features #comparisons
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Use synonyms
Population
Add an article
The population
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 has been a tremendous factor in a country’s development.
Summary
Correct article usage
A summary
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 of Japan’s
population
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
earlier, now and in future has been provided.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss
about
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
the variations in japans
population
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 different timescales. The crowd level of the country is least in past with only about 84.1
million
Use synonyms
 people and there is an extensive increase
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
population
Use synonyms
 between 1990 to 2015 with
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
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 deviations. The elevated level of people was from 123.6 to 125.4
million
Use synonyms
 in
25years
Correct your spelling
25 years
.the
population
Use synonyms
 shows
sudden
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a sudden
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 drop of
15million
Correct your spelling
15 million
 persons
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2035.
After
Linking Words
Linking Words
this
Add a comma
,this
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 the
population
Use synonyms
 tend to decrease to
89.9million
Correct your spelling
89.9 million
 almost similar to the earlier 1950s. The data showed
percentage
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the percentage
a percentage
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 of people aged
65years
Correct your spelling
65 years
 or over is 4.9%
withy
Correct your spelling
with
show examples
 4.1
million
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 headcounts in 1950 and there will be a dramatic uplift to 41% in future with
36.5million
Correct your spelling
36.5 million
 champs. The
population
Use synonyms
 increase could lead to increased demands for food and other resources.
This
Linking Words
 can be controlled by birth control measures that should be taken by the government.
To conclude
Linking Words
 Japan’s
population
Use synonyms
 will be extending in upcoming years and measures
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
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 to be carried out to control it.
Submitted by surejajasmin10 on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words population, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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