The chart below shows the different levels of post-school qualifications in Australia and the proportion of men and women who held them in 1999
This
graph demonstrates Change preposition
to us
us
the divergent levels of after-school qualifications in Correct pronoun usage
apply
Austraila
and the Correct your spelling
Australia
proportion
of males
and females
who held them in 1999.
This
is a static chart which describes post-school degrees according to
sex.Men have the highest level in
skilled vocational Change preposition
of
diploma
.Fix the agreement mistake
diplomas
In addition
,the lowest level of females
also
can be found in this
aspect.On the contrary
,the best result for women is undergraduate diploma
level unlike
Add the comma(s)
,unlike
males
.
In 1999, skilled vocational diploma
contains approximately 20% of women,but 90% of males
have
qualified from Unnecessary verb
apply
this
section.In undergraduate
Correct article usage
the undergraduate
diploma
part,females
have about 70% proportion
contrary of
men's 40% success.Change preposition
to
This
is the lowest rate of
Change preposition
for
males
.
Furthermore
,feminine power shows itself in bachelor's
Correct article usage
a bachelor's
degree
too.In Fix the agreement mistake
degrees
this
part, both of these sexes are almost equal and the proportion
is about 50%.Master's degree
and postgraduate Fix the agreement mistake
degrees
diploma
are totally different.BecauseFix the agreement mistake
diplomas
,
in postgraduate Remove the comma
apply
diploma
Add a comma
,diploma
females
have 30% and males
have 70% proportion
.In master's degree indicator which
shows female rates Correct pronoun usage
apply
incrasing
Correct your spelling
increasing
contrary
Change preposition
in contrary
of
men.The final line demonstrates Change preposition
to
40
% Correct article usage
a 40
proportion
for females
and approximately 60% for males
.Submitted by azmvski on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words proportion, males, females, diploma with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "proportion" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
▼
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!