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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#show #percentage #water #purposes #six #areas #world #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The
percentage
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 of
water
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 consumed by people in six
diversity
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diverse
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regions
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 namely North
America
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, South
America
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, Europe, Central
Asia
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 and South East
Asia
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 are demonstrated in the pie charts
according to
Linking Words
 the type of purposes which are industrial
use
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, agricultural
use
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 and domestic
use
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.
For
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From
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 an
overall
Linking Words
 perspective,
while
Linking Words
 people have mostly preferred to consume for agricultural
use
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 in Africa, Central
Asia
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, South East
Asia
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 and South
America
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, citizens of North
America
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 and Europe utilize
the
Correct article usage
apply
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about half of
water
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 for industrial
purpose
Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
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. In North
America
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 and Europe, the lowest
percentage
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 of
water
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 consumed is domestic
use
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with
Change preposition
at
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 13% and 15%,
although
Linking Words
 the highest
water
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use
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 is shown in industrial
use
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 at 48% and 535, respectively. Agricultural uses have nearly the same
percentage
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 approximately 30% which is
Linking Words
third
Correct article usage
a third
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as
Change preposition
of
show examples
Use synonyms
water
Correct article usage
the water
show examples
 consumed in other
regions
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 as.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, having the lowest
percentage
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 of
water
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use
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 is the industrial field in the given other
regions
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 with nearly 10% and under, whilst the
percentage
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 of agricultural uses of
water
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 has a vast of
water
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 used with about 80% in those
regions
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.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, water, regions, america, asia, use with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • water consumption
  • agricultural, industrial, domestic
  • usage patterns
  • developed vs developing regions
  • irrigation systems
  • climate factors
  • percentage breakdown
  • water management
  • sustainability
  • residential water use
  • efficiency
  • charts comparison
  • water-intensive
  • water scarcity
  • resource allocation
  • desalination
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