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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table below shows the numbers of people in each age group working in certain sectors in the UK in 1998 and 2006. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below shows the numbers of people in each age group working in certain sectors in the UK in 1998 and 2006. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The table compares the quantities of
individuals
Use synonyms
 in each age group working in specific sectors in the UK between 2
years
Use synonyms
, 1998 and 2006.
It is clear that
Linking Words
 there is a huge
number
Use synonyms
 of
individuals
Use synonyms
joined
Correct pronoun usage
who joined
show examples
Technology
Correct article usage
the Technology
show examples
 sector in 2006.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 from the age 56 to 65
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 the lowest
number
Use synonyms
 in every sector. As can be seen,
while
Linking Words
 the quantities of
individuals
Use synonyms
 in each age group working in hotel and catering
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 dropped slightly, the
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who work in
Technology
Correct article usage
the Technology
show examples
 sector rose magnificently between 2
years
Use synonyms
, 1998 and 2006.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, fewer
people
Use synonyms
 chose Building to work
during
Change preposition
for
show examples
 2
years
Use synonyms
 and so as education.
However
Linking Words
, there is an increase in
education
Correct article usage
the education
show examples
 of the
people
Use synonyms
 from 26 to 35. In
final
Add an article
the final
show examples
 analysis, over the past 8
years
Use synonyms
 from 1998 to 2006, the
number
Use synonyms
 of
individuals
Use synonyms
 who chose Technology to work has rocketed a lot but the other sectors plummeted significantly

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Vocabulary: Replace the words individuals, years, number, people with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • workforce distribution
  • significant
  • sector
  • trend
  • increase/decrease
  • composition
  • employment patterns
  • shift
  • notable
  • preference
  • age group
  • contrast
  • analyze
  • composition
  • reaffirm
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