The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#bar #percentage #australian #men #women #age #groups #activity #summarise #information #features #comparisons

The chart

show

Change the verb form

shows

show examples

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

the proportion of Australian workers

who

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

include

Wrong verb form

including

show examples

men and women in each

age

group choosing

labor

Change the spelling

labour

show examples

job in 2010. It is clearly seen that the rate of

Change the article

the number

show examples

number of

Correct quantifier usage

apply

show examples

women from 15 to 44

age

increased slowly around from 48

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

to 52

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

. There was a steady static in the value of

female

Correct article usage

the female

show examples

age

group from 35 to 64 with about 52

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

and the former slightly decrease from 52 to 47

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

when they are over 65 years old. Different from

Add an article

the girl

a girl

show examples

girl

Fix the agreement mistake

girls

show examples

, the percentage of boys from 15 to 34 years old dropped sharply around 11

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

in 2010. There

are

Change the verb form

show examples

a mild fluctuation

around

Change preposition

of around

show examples

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

in the proportion of women choosing

physical

Add an article

a physical

show examples

activity from 25 to 54

age

Additionally

, It tended to grow consistently

about

Change preposition

by about

show examples

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

from 45 to over 65

age

Sat Mar 28 2020

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Linking words: Add more linking words.

▼

Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Vocabulary: Replace the words age, percent with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.

▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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1Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

141 words

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Percentage
Australian men
Australian women
Age groups
Regular physical activity
Participated
Increased
Decreased
Proportion
Physically active
Gender difference
Engaged
Exercise

What to do next:

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The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Child labour is considered to be one of the most serious problems ob the planet. What are the reasons why children find themselves in child labour and can be done to tackle this issue ?

some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation such as unsatisfactory job or shortage of money.others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.disscus both views and give your own opinion.

In some cultures, people often tell children that they could achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this advice?

Some people believe that children are given too much free time. They feel that this time should be used to do more school work. To what extent do you agree.