IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

he graph below shows population figures for India and China since the year 2000 and predicted population growth up until 2050. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

he graph below shows population figures for India and China since the year 2000 and predicted population growth up until 2050. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
#population #figures #india #china #year #growth #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The line graph shows the change
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
population
 between 2000 and 2050 in 2 countries, namely
China
 and
India
. In 2000, the
number of
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
population
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
China
 was 1.25
billions
Change to singular
billion
show examples
 and 1 billion in
India
. 2020 saw an increase in
total
Change the article
a total
the total
show examples
number
 of
population
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
1.35
billions
Change to singular
billion
show examples
 in
India
. There was
an
Change the article
a
show examples
 very slight increase
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
number
 of
population
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
1.425
billions
Change to singular
billion
show examples
 in
China
during
Change preposition
from
show examples
 2000 to 2020. 2030saw an increase in
total
Add an article
the total
show examples
number
 of
Add an article
a citizen
the citizen
show examples
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
 in
India
 successively at 1.45
billions
Change to singular
billion
show examples
 same
number
 as
China
.
During
Change preposition
From
show examples
 2030 to 2050, there are a steady decrease in the
number
 of
Chinese
Add an article
a Chinese
show examples
citizen
Change to a plural noun
citizens
show examples
 and significant growth in the
number
 of
India
Replace the word
Indian
show examples
 people.
Population
expected
Add a missing verb
is expected
show examples
 to
beyond
Add a missing verb
be beyond
show examples
China
 in
India
 after 2030,
both
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
at 1.45
billions
Change to singular
billion
show examples
. 1.6
billions
Correct your spelling
billion
show examples
 of
population
 and 1.4
billions
Correct your spelling
billion
show examples
 of
population
 will be expected in
India
 and
China
 respectively.
To sum up
, over 50 years,
China
 was going to rise
steady
Change the adjective
steadily
show examples
its
Change preposition
in its
show examples
population
 and
peck
Correct your spelling
peak
show examples
 in 2030.
number
Add an article
the number
show examples
is stably decrease
Change the verb form
is stably decreased
show examples
 from 2030 to 2050 in
China
.
However
,
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 is
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
successively
Change the adverb
successive
show examples
 growth in
India
 over
duration
Add an article
the duration
a duration
show examples
 of 50 years.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words population, china, india, number, billions with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 6 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: