The pie charts below show the online sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The pie charts below show the online sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The figures illustrate the proportion of four different online retail
sales
Use synonyms
categories in New Zealand in two different periods. It can be seen that the
sales
Use synonyms
of film or music and books in the country had increased over the ten-year period,
while
Linking Words
travel
Correct article usage
the travel
show examples
and clothing sectors were in the opposite position. In 2003, the online
sales
Use synonyms
of travel industries in New Zealand accounted for 36% of the total
sector
Use synonyms
, which was 12% higher than the clothing
sector
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, over the decade, both figures
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
declined sharply to 29% and 16% respectively. In the film or music category, it is noticed that the online
sales
Use synonyms
figure of the
sector
Use synonyms
had risen drastically by 12% to reach 33% in 2013. As for the
sector
Use synonyms
of books, it had increased slightly from 19% in 2003 to 22% in 2013. In conclusion,
it is clear that
Linking Words
between 2003 and 2013, the online
sales
Use synonyms
of travel and clothing in New Zealand had dropped,
while
Linking Words
the
sales
Use synonyms
of film and music and books had grown.
Submitted by Quynh Tran on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words sales, sector with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: