Employers should give their staff at least a 4-week holiday a year to make employees better at their jobs. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Employers should give their staff at least a 4-week holiday a year to make employees better at their jobs. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Employees and workers are overwhelmed with a fast changing world.
industry
Suggestion
Industry
force is spending more time
at
Suggestion
on
task and offices to get promotion, bonuses and compensation to be successful. In the midst of a busy production schedule struggle schedule, some argue that it is damaging their personal behaviour and life relationships.
Therefore
, companies should reconsider their time off and working period.
Furthermore
, a 30-day rest from job sounds like a great idea to motivate and encourage to production hard.
To begin
with, companies, industries and factories are functioning at unprecedented scale.
This
is because of increasing demand of industry force to meet global supply of the market.
This
rapid boost in the economy has forced them to
endeavor
a purposeful or industrious undertaking (especially one that requires effort or boldness)
endeavour
non-stop and weekends as well.
Such
practises are harmful to individual and gets isolated from the outside world.
Hence
,
this
group are not able to spend enough time with their families and friends.
Moreover
, I support that the employer should provide a month off from
effort
Suggestion
the effort
.
This
will allow employees to follow their passion and take a break from
endeavor
Suggestion
the endeavour
endeavour
. Apparently,
such
changes will develop a feeling of pride towards the company and will effort harder. On the flip side, one might argue that
such
huge break can redirect their motive for production.
In addition
, we have seen many cases of employees misusing their holiday.
Such
behaviour can reduce the productivity of the companies. In summary, we can conclude that benefits of 4-week holiday outweigh the rest.
In addition
, punishing everyone for misbehaviour of the individual is unworthy.
Hence
, not only employees are more attentive, focused and motivated but
also
bring gigantic profit and revenue indirectly.
Therefore
, I highly encourage to remodel its structure.
Submitted by Shreya on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Rest and recuperate
  • Increased productivity
  • Mental health
  • Enhanced creativity
  • Problem-solving
  • Reduced burnout
  • Job satisfaction
  • Work-life balance
  • Long-term benefits
  • Motivated workforce
  • Mental space
  • Extended break
  • Employee performance
  • Healthier workforce
  • Ample time
What to do next:
Look at other essays: