Women and men are commonly seen as having different strength and weakness.It is right to exclude males or females from certain professions because of their gender?

#women #men #strength #weakness #right #males #females #professions #gender

It is believed that females and males have different abilities in terms of strength and weakness.I completely agree with the opinion that women and

men

should have specified careers in order to the

gender

distinction.

That is

to say,

gender

consensus claims that women do not have physical and mental requirements which are significant in order to participate in some activities.

However

this

attitude might come from a sexual stereotype that mentioned

men

’s superiority.

For instance

, females are not allowed to join the Army in many countries.Whilst, in other societies women may be seen in the front line of war.Added to

this

, in Islamic countries females cannot do various posts because of religious beliefs.

Consequently

this

notion has a masculine trend behind it.

Furthermore

, society does not accept

men

in some

position

Fix the agreement mistake

positions

show examples

mainly believed as female work. Since

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

customers are not willing to have been serviced by

men

in some professions which require more delicacy and careful consideration

such

as nursery and kindergarten.

Moreover

, they prefer to see a madam as a bridal hairdresser rather than a man.

In addition

, many company holders would rather

Remove the marker

apply

show examples

admit

male

Fix the agreement mistake

males

show examples

for

Change preposition

show examples

the workplace in order to increase

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

productivity.Ultimately, many reckon several professions appropriate for a certain

gender

. In conclusion, there are many jobs that are assigned

for

Change preposition

show examples

a specific

gender

Men

’s attitude display that if female do some careers, it would lead to failure.

Thus

, certain posts are traditionally suitable for

men

. As they have believed not only are

men

hard-working,but they are

also

powerful and intelligent.

Submitted by shabnam.sohanian on Fri Dec 03 2021

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

251 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Women and men are commonly seen as having different strength and weakness.It is right to exclude males or females from certain professions because of their gender?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think young people should be required to have full time education until they are at least 18 years old. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Due to globalization, many countries lose their traditions and national values. Some people think it is the responsibility of governments to protect these values. Do you agree or disagree?

despite the increased access to education, a significant number of people cannot read or write, what are the disadvantages, and what actions the should government take?