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Band 4

Big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. To what extent do your agree or disagree?

#salary #job #satisfaction
There is no denying that, nowadays,high wages are important in a personʼs
life
. Some people think that it is completely against the idea . I strongly agree with the idea and I will support
this
 view with arguments in the following paragraphs . Fırst and foremost,
life
 is unimaginable without
money
 . Since , we need
money
 for our daily needs , clothes , travels, and so on .
Therefore
,
money
 is playing an increasingly important role in human
life
. I think that
high
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
 salary must in
life
 not only
daily
Change preposition
for daily
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 needs
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 but
also
Correct your spelling
business
busness
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for busness
show examples
 and other things.
For example
, take my brother. He worked from a physical education class in school. He did not feel job satisfaction, as, the salary he was receiving was not enough to meet his needs. He was soon offered a well-paying job and he accepted.
On the other hand
, not everything in
life
 depends on
money
.
In particular
, there are
also
 those who think that a person should laugh at
life
 and be satisfied with his work . As
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 some are very risky , they prefer job satisfaction. Alternatively, people want to do
start-up
Add an article
a start-up
show examples
 , they should
to
Change the verb form
apply
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have enough means. Another factor to consider is
,
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apply
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 if they do not have enough
money
 they can not pursue their hobbies . To sum up, taking everything into consideration that
However
, making less
money
 doing what you love can deprive people of many things and it can change the way you look at
life
.
Submitted by uluga2002 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • remuneration
  • financial security
  • motivation
  • luxuries
  • material possessions
  • fulfillment
  • work-life balance
  • stress levels
  • mental well-being
  • job security
What to do next:
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