Big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. To what extent do your agree or disagree?

#salary #job #satisfaction

There is no denying that, nowadays,high wages are important in a personʼs

life

. Some people think that it is completely against the idea . I strongly agree with the idea and I will support

this

view with arguments in the following paragraphs . Fırst and foremost,

life

is unimaginable without

money

. Since , we need

money

for our daily needs , clothes , travels, and so on .

Therefore

money

is playing an increasingly important role in human

life

. I think that

high

Correct article usage

a high

show examples

salary must in

life

not only

daily

Change preposition

for daily

show examples

needs

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

Correct your spelling

business

busness

Change preposition

for busness

show examples

and other things.

For example

, take my brother. He worked from a physical education class in school. He did not feel job satisfaction, as, the salary he was receiving was not enough to meet his needs. He was soon offered a well-paying job and he accepted.

On the other hand

, not everything in

life

depends on

money

In particular

, there are

also

those who think that a person should laugh at

life

and be satisfied with his work . As

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

some are very risky , they prefer job satisfaction. Alternatively, people want to do

start-up

Add an article

a start-up

show examples

, they should

Change the verb form

apply

show examples

have enough means. Another factor to consider is

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

if they do not have enough

money

they can not pursue their hobbies . To sum up, taking everything into consideration that

However

, making less

money

doing what you love can deprive people of many things and it can change the way you look at

life

Submitted by uluga2002 on Tue Feb 22 2022

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

248 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

remuneration
financial security
motivation
luxuries
material possessions
fulfillment
work-life balance
stress levels
mental well-being
job security

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Big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. To what extent do your agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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