IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

big salary is much more important than job satisfaction do you agree or disagree?

#salary #job #satisfaction
The tables reveal information about seven educational difficulties encountered by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
student
 in
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
 A and B between 2005 and 2015. Overall, children in
school
 A have more
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
 than
other
Correct pronoun usage
others
show examples
.
However
, in 2015, the figure of the trouble in the
first
school
 tends to decreased compared
2005
Change preposition
to 2005
show examples
 while
school
 B
percentage
 remained approximately similar in 2015 as well. On the one hand, in
school
 A, the
student
 had more problem about following instructions with 42% while reading ability was least in 2005.
Also
, concentration in
lesson
Correct article usage
the lesson
show examples
 had the
second
difficult
Correct quantifier usage
most difficult
show examples
 level with 40% and verbal expression of ideas and listening skills the same level with 35%.
By contrast
 with 2015, the
percentage
 of concentration in lessons and following instructions was the fewest
as
Change preposition
at
show examples
 18%. Handwriting accounted level off with 28% in two years, yet it was the most
percentage
 of the problem in 2015.
On the other hand
, in
school
 B,
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
 have still had better abilities. Handwriting stabilizes with 7%, accounting for the lowest proportion from 2005 to 2015. Meanwhile, the number of
student
 concentration in lessons unchanged steady at 15% and it was the most
percentage
. After that, the
student
 had listening skills and following instructions equally important at 12%.
Submitted by mayokz.chalita on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • remuneration
  • financial security
  • motivation
  • luxuries
  • material possessions
  • fulfillment
  • work-life balance
  • stress levels
  • mental well-being
  • job security
What to do next:
Look at other essays: