People today don't make good use of their time and spend too much time watching TV and playing video games instead of participating in more productive activities. Do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
People
Use synonyms
nowadays spend too much
time
Use synonyms
watching
television
Use synonyms
and playing
video
Use synonyms
games
Use synonyms
, rather than participating in more productive
activities
Use synonyms
. Personally, I totally agree with
this
Linking Words
for two reasons.
First
Linking Words
of all, I do believe that
people
Use synonyms
nowadays, especially youngsters are mostly addicted to watching
television
Use synonyms
and playing
video
Use synonyms
games
Use synonyms
in their
leisure
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
.
Although
Linking Words
there is not a definite way
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
how to spend
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
leisure
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
, I believe that there is an acceptable level of spending
time
Use synonyms
on
leisure
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
. If the
leisure
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
is within
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
hours but
not
Add a missing verb
does not
show examples
affect the normal working hours, it is considered
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
acceptable.
However
Linking Words
, youngsters are usually spending too much
time
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
chilling out and
the
Change the word
their
show examples
study or work
is interfered
Change to the active voice
interferes
has interfered
show examples
.
Change preposition
with.
show examples
In addition
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
prefer to spend
time
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
watching
television
Use synonyms
and
video
Use synonyms
games
Use synonyms
, rather than participating in more productive
activities
Use synonyms
. Productive
activities
Use synonyms
can be defined as
Correct your spelling
some things
show examples
somethings
Correct your spelling
something
show examples
which can help to acquire more
knowledges
Change the wording
knowledge
pieces of knowledge
bits of knowledge
show examples
such
Linking Words
as reading books or newspapers or improve
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
well-being
such
Linking Words
as doing sports or taking part in outdoor
activities
Use synonyms
.
People
Use synonyms
tend to spend
time
Use synonyms
sedentarily which is perceived to be unproductive while doing
outdoors
Replace the word
outdoor
show examples
sports
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
perceived to be productive since well-being is being improved. In conclusion, it is strongly believed that
people
Use synonyms
today, particularly youngsters spend too much
time
Use synonyms
watching
television
Use synonyms
and playing
video
Use synonyms
games
Use synonyms
, rather than taking part in more productive
activities
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
as reading books or doing sports in their
leisure
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
. It is suggested that parents should set a maximum amount of
leisure
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
for their children and recommend outdoor family
activities
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
as cycling or jogging as a way of relaxing.
Submitted by Ceci.law on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: