The graphs below show the post-school qualifications held by Canadians in the age groups 25 to 35 and 45 to 55. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

The graphs below show the post-school qualifications held by Canadians in the age groups 25 to 35 and 45 to 55.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Write at least 150 words.
The pie charts depict the proportion of different qualifications which were held by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Canadians
aged between 25 to 35 and 45 to 55.
Overall
, it should be clearly seen that most
Canadians
aged between 25 to 35 hold a
degree
related to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
administration, social
science
, arts and Social
Science
, Maths,
Computers
Correct word choice
and Computers
show examples
while
most
Canadians
aged between 45 to 55 hold a
degree
related to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Social
Science
, Arts and Engineering. It is
also
worth mentioning that Social
Science
and
Arts’
Change noun form
Arts
show examples
degree
was by far the most popular among
two
Correct article usage
the two
show examples
aged
Replace the word
age
show examples
groups. Regarding
to
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Social
Science
and Arts, both
aged
Replace the word
age
show examples
groups accounted for
similar
Correct article usage
a similar
show examples
percentage, with around 20%.
Likewise
, both
aged
Replace the word
age
show examples
groups
also
had
similar
Add an article
a similar
show examples
percentage
Fix the agreement mistake
percentages
show examples
in terms of Education and Humanities, which was roughly average
14
Change preposition
of 14
show examples
% and 5 % respectively. In sharp contrast,
while
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
people
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
aged
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
25 to 35 preferred Administration (19%) and
Science
, Maths,
Computers
Correct word choice
and Computers
show examples
(18%) more when compared to the other aged
group
which was 15% and 10% respectively.
On the other hand
, the
Canadians
aged
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
35 to 45 preferred Engineering (19%) more when compared to the other aged
group
, at only 9%, which was very similar to the figures for the nursing
degree
, with 11% in the aged
group
between 45 to 55 and 7 % in the aged
group
between 25 and 35.
Submitted by gac7077 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, while".
Vocabulary: Replace the words canadians, degree, science, group with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: