IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

People in senior management positions should have a higher salary than other workers in a company or an organization. Do you agree or disagree?

In modern
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
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, the topic of salary among staff always creates a conflict in an
organization
Change the spelling
organisation
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. In
this
Linking Words
 situation, some people argued that senior personnel should have
an
Correct article usage
a
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ample
Correct word choice
higher
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 amount of salary than other workers in a
company
Punctuation problem
company,
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while
Linking Words
 others contradict
this
Linking Words
 situation. I will discuss both views and come up with a conclusion.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
senior
Correct article usage
the senior
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 department or the workers who dominate in a higher area should have higher salaries than other
public
Check wording
employees
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.
This
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 particular thinking is beneficial for an
organization
Change the spelling
organisation
show examples
 in many ways in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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terms of competition, better image, work productivity, and many more. By practising
this
Linking Words
 activity
not
Punctuation problem
, not
show examples
 only the productivity of the community but
also
Linking Words
 their growth will increase.
For instance
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, if a company is giving higher paychecks to senior people
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then
Punctuation problem
, then
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 the others will
also
Linking Words
 start working confidently, they believe that if they do hard
work
Punctuation problem
work,
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then
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 they will be promoted to a higher position
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 they will
also
Linking Words
 get a good package.
On the other hand
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, some believe that everyone should be treated
equally
Punctuation problem
equally,
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 either by their knowledge or by their role in an
organization
Change the spelling
organisation
show examples
. If everyone
will get
Wrong verb form
gets
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a
Correct article usage
the
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 same
paycheck
Punctuation problem
paycheck,
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then
Linking Words
 it creates a negative environment in the company.
For instance
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, the institute at higher positions will force the
worker
Fix the agreement mistake
workers
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of
Change preposition
in
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 lower positions to do their work, and the person in a greater
place
Check wording
position
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 will enjoy
full time
Use the right word
full-time
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. In conclusion, considering both aspects, I firmly believe that everyone should be paid
according to
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 their qualification ,not on their
stand
Check wording
standing
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. So
this
Linking Words
 will not create a partial environment among all the workers.

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Task response
State a clear view in the intro and end with a simple, strong line that repeats your main idea.
Task response
Make one big idea in each paragraph and explain it with a short, real example.
Coherence
Link ideas with easy words like also, but, because, for example, to show flow.
Coherence
Keep the flow steady so each part leads to the next.
Content
The essay shows both sides of the topic.
Examples
There are example lines to show what you mean.
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