Some people believe that violence on television and in computer games has a damaging effect on the society. Others deny that these factors have any significant influence on people's behaviour. What is your opinion?

Today, the amount of violence
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
media is growing, While some experts argue that
this
trend will lead to significant damage within
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society, others
Correct your spelling
denied
deny
denie
Correct your spelling
deny
that and claim it has no effect on
Add an article
the human
a human
show examples
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
. In my opinion, I strongly support the idea that violence
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
a negative impact on
human’s
Change noun form
human
show examples
attitude.
To begin
with, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people, especially young children, try to imitate the actions of the characters in movies and TV shows and having a movie filled with brutality can lead
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
society into trouble. Young generations are immersed in television and
Internet
Correct article usage
the Internet
show examples
and get highly influenced,
thus
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
violent actions can increase their
Correct your spelling
aggression
aggrestion
Correct your spelling
aggression
.
For instance
, after the launch of a film that includes bloodshed and abusive language, more crimes appear,
who
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
support
Correct subject-verb agreement
supports
show examples
the
ideal
Correct your spelling
idea
show examples
of
film's
Correct article usage
the film's
show examples
character.
Moreover
, the depiction of aggression and crimes on television spreads
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
sense of anxiety and insecurity in the community.
Likewise
, violent
video-games
Correct your spelling
video games
show examples
have a devastating effect on the mindset of the crowd, particularly youngsters. While watching action movies is a passive activity, playing
frantic
Add an article
the frantic
a frantic
show examples
digital
game
Fix the agreement mistake
games
show examples
is an active one,
therefore
,
is
Correct your spelling
it
show examples
often jeopardises the players' mental health. To
further
explain, though virtually but players get involved in the act of cruelty while they are in a fighting game and at some point, they could mimic
this
in the real world.
For instance
, a group of students in our school used to play a game called “Street Fighter” and they mostly were involved in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
indiscipline as fighting with other children. In conclusion, fighting on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
television and
video
Change preposition
in video
show examples
games could be responsible for altering the mindset and character of an individual and arousing the act of cruelty.
Submitted by thaiannt on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • pivotal
  • desensitize
  • catalyst
  • predisposed
  • harmless outlet
  • distinguish
  • controlled environments
  • empirical research
  • minimal or no direct correlation
  • socio-economic status
  • predisposition
What to do next:
Look at other essays: