Some people believe that time spent on television, video and computer games can be beneficial to children. Others believe this has negative effects on a child. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #time #television #video #computer #games #children #effects #child

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It is true that some people assume that

time

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spent on

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programms

Correct your spelling

programmes

programs

video

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and computer

games

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can be useful to

children

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while others believe that

this

Linking Words

has a negative effect on

children

Use synonyms

.Personally, I believe that spending too much

time

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on television and virtual

games

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would

effect

Correct your spelling

affect

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

children

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negatively unless they

limited

Add a missing verb

are limited

show examples

. There are several reasons why we should not allow

children

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spent most of their

time

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to watch

Change the verb form

watching

show examples

Use synonyms

and

play

Wrong verb form

playing

show examples

video

Use synonyms

games

Use synonyms

Firstly

Linking Words

children

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might become addicted to

Correct the article-noun agreement

video games

a video game

show examples

video

Use synonyms

games

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As a result

Linking Words

, they will start

behav

Correct your spelling

behaving

themselves differently.

For example

Linking Words

, when we don't allow them to play

video

Use synonyms

games

Use synonyms

, they start crying or screaming.

Secondly

Linking Words

, communication with people would be challenging for them.

Finally

Linking Words

children

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can have an issue with their

educations

Fix the agreement mistake

education

show examples

because

video

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games

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causes

Change the verb form

cause

show examples

pain

into

Change preposition

show examples

the brain.

However

Linking Words

, researchers proved that

children

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who spent

time

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watching

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, have

ability

Add an article

the ability

show examples

of understanding

Replace the preposition

to understand

show examples

other languages.

For instance

Linking Words

, French, Germany and English.

Therefore

Linking Words

, if there

Change the verb form

are

show examples

educational problems . In conclusion, I believe that watching

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and playing

video

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games

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are useful recourses but

Correct pronoun usage

they

show examples

should be limited

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because

children

Use synonyms

should

spent

Change the verb form

spend

show examples

their free

time

Use synonyms

playing outdoor

games

Use synonyms

and hobbies .

Submitted by sherzod5574485 on Fri Dec 23 2022

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Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

196 words

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Some people believe that time spent on television, video and computer games can be beneficial to children. Others believe this has negative effects on a child. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Word Count

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Some people think that Zoo's are all cruel and should be closed down. Others, however believe that zoo can be useful in protecting wild animals. discuss both views and give your opinion.