Some people believe that violence on television and in computer games has a damaging effect on the society. Others deny that these factors have any significant influence on people's behaviour. What is your opinion?

#people #violence #television #computer #games #effect #society #factors #influence #behaviour

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

These days, the amount of

violence

Use synonyms

media

Use synonyms

is growing. While some

people

Use synonyms

argue that

this

Linking Words

trend will undoubtedly lead humans to a dangerous future, others claim that it has no damaging effect on

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society. I believe that in most cases

media

Use synonyms

violence

Use synonyms

doesn't affect

people

Use synonyms

's behaviour.

Firstly

Linking Words

, I think that

people

Use synonyms

act on their motives, regardless of what they see on

television

Use synonyms

That is

Linking Words

to say, if someone intends to do harm to somebody,

that is

Linking Words

not because of watching TV or playing computer games

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but due to that person's character and education.

For example

Linking Words

, it is generally considered that violent

media

Use synonyms

accustoms viewers to cruelty,but I doubt

this

Linking Words

opinion. In my view, reasonable and intelligent

people

Use synonyms

treat others humanely irrespective of what they see or hear in fictional stories.

Moreover

Linking Words

, video games and

television

Use synonyms

may even reduce social

violence

Use synonyms

by providing a safe outlet for aggressiveness.

For instance

Linking Words

, truculent

people

Use synonyms

may fight in virtual reality

instead

Linking Words

of evincing their combative spirit in

real

Add an article

the real

show examples

world.

This

Linking Words

may not only help those

people

Use synonyms

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

Linking Words

reduce the level of social

violence

Use synonyms

long-term

Add an article

a long-term

the long-term

show examples

perspective.

Finally

Linking Words

, despite many claims and assumptions about

negative

Correct article usage

the negative

show examples

effects of

television

Use synonyms

and computer

games

Add a comma

,games

show examples

I have never seen any proven connection between violent

media

Use synonyms

and illegal activities in social life. Taking everything into consideration, I would say that

violence

Use synonyms

in contemporary

media

Use synonyms

has no substantial influence on

people

Use synonyms

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

Television

Use synonyms

and computers are not the main factors that shape personal character, and they can even be useful in reducing the level of

violence

Use synonyms

Submitted by abhinayam on Mon Jan 23 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

258 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

pivotal
desensitize
catalyst
predisposed
harmless outlet
distinguish
controlled environments
empirical research
minimal or no direct correlation
socio-economic status
predisposition

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
Some parents think that childcare centres provide the best services for children of preschool age. Other working parents think that family members such as grandparents will be better carers for their kids.
Nowadays, most parents spend most of the day working and do not have time to care for their children. Some parents give their children to their grandparents to take care of them. However, this causes problems in the proper upbringing of children. Because we know that grandparents always give their grandchildren what they want. Things that are forbidden at home are not forbidden at your grandparents' house. Accordingly, children always try to stay away from home and want to stay at their grandparents' house, where everything they want is done. This has a negative effect on the growing and upbringing of the child. Preschool is best for children. First of all, there are many activities for children's development in preschool. They have few peers around them, and this has a positive effect on the child's development. In this way, the child will have the ability to communication easily. Some parents are worried when sending their children to preschool because they don't know what kind o...
6.5
band
Studying art in school improves students' performance in other subjects, because it is easier for multi-skilled students to learn new things. That's why art should be obligatory in schools. Do you agree or disagree?
It is considered that Studying art helps students to perform in other subjects very well as it gives them the ability to learn more new things. I completely agree with this statement and i think it is extremely important to be included as a subject in school.
6
band
In some countries, younger people are neglecting their right to vote. What problems does this cause and what are some of the possible solutions?
It is argued that in certain nations youth are not using their right to vote. This would hinder the political change, and it would also result in policies made that are not beneficial for these young people. The most viable solutions would be to create awareness among the younger generation and promote them to participate in politics.
5.5
band
Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough on learning practical skill. Do you agree or disagree?
It is true that education plays a crucial role in human lives. Some say that from all primary education to universities focus more theoretical-based on education instead of learning practical skill. I strongly agree with this statement because practical is required for getting employment and it affects innovative and creative ideas. This essay discusses it briefly for the following reasons.
5.5
band
A lot of places in the world rely on tourism as a main source of income. Unfortunately, tourism can also be a source of problems if it is not managed correctly. Describe the advantages and disadvantages of tourism in the modern world. Do you think that benefits of tourism outweight its drawbacks?
Nowadays tourism generates a significant portion of national income for many countries, but it has certain drawbacks too. This essay will examine the advantages and disadvantages of tourism and provide a logical conclusion.

Some people believe that violence on television and in computer games has a damaging effect on the society. Others deny that these factors have any significant influence on people's behaviour. What is your opinion?

Fully explain your ideas

Some parents think that childcare centres provide the best services for children of preschool age. Other working parents think that family members such as grandparents will be better carers for their kids.

Studying art in school improves students' performance in other subjects, because it is easier for multi-skilled students to learn new things. That's why art should be obligatory in schools. Do you agree or disagree?

In some countries, younger people are neglecting their right to vote. What problems does this cause and what are some of the possible solutions?

Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough on learning practical skill. Do you agree or disagree?

A lot of places in the world rely on tourism as a main source of income. Unfortunately, tourism can also be a source of problems if it is not managed correctly. Describe the advantages and disadvantages of tourism in the modern world. Do you think that benefits of tourism outweight its drawbacks?