In country where there is a high unemployment, most pupils should be offered only primary education. There is no point in offering secondary education to those who will have no hop of finding a job. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some places where there is
high
Add an article
a high
the high
show examples
percentage of
people
unemploy, and get
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
support
from governments. Though there are some limitations
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
Correct article usage
the appliation
show examples
appliation
Correct your spelling
application
to
support
, it still
cause
Change the verb form
causes
show examples
many
problomes
Correct your spelling
problems
for
residents
of living.
According to
many facts in countries, there are several difficult situations and I
partial
Change the word
partially
show examples
agree that
people
can not get
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
support
because of their education, I will express my ideas in
this
eassy
Correct your spelling
essay
easy
.
Firstly
, in big
concentient
Correct your spelling
consentient
like America, Europe and Australia
for instance
,
residents
live
Correct pronoun usage
who live
show examples
in
different
Add an article
the different
show examples
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
have different rules to follow. In other
word
Fix the agreement mistake
words
show examples
,
people
from
north
Correct article usage
the north
show examples
of Australia may get the
society
Replace the word
social
show examples
support
if they lose their
job
with the
condiction
Correct your spelling
condition
show examples
of none quit by themselves;
however
, citizens in the south, cannot get any aid if they do not
proof
Replace the word
prove
show examples
that they leave the
job
because the company fire them directly without reasons.
Secondly
, those
residents
who lose jobs are more or
lesss
Correct your spelling
less
have less
education
Replace the word
educated
show examples
, so it is hard for workers to find someone to help them apply for the application to get aid
form
Correct your spelling
from
show examples
Correct article usage
the governments
show examples
governments
Fix the agreement mistake
government
show examples
. On one hand, the governments in every country
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
built a
support
system to help
residents
look for a
job
,
for example
, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
European
Add an article
the European
show examples
countries have
professional
Add an article
a professional
the professional
show examples
office to assist their citizens
participate
Add the particle
to participate
show examples
in
trainning
Correct your spelling
training
course for
being
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
job
Add an article
a job
show examples
seeker and match
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
employers and employees afterwards.
On the other hand
, after training the
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
will give each
memeber
Correct your spelling
member
a certification to prove that they have learned the skills. Though it does not count as credit as in the university, it helps
brunch
Correct article usage
a brunch
show examples
of
people
get new jobs without
worry
Change the verb form
worrying
show examples
their background. The
job
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
will help members practice
interview
Fix the agreement mistake
interviews
show examples
and coach them to find
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
suitable work;
however
, there are some bugs in the system, some
people
apply to be a
job
seeker
Fix the agreement mistake
seekers
show examples
, but they play tricks to fail their interviews and get the
peper
Correct your spelling
paper
to prove that they need to continue training. Meanwhile, it wastes
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
money and time to train
people
who have the same
attutitude
Correct your spelling
attitude
as them. In conclusion, though there are some benefits which
makes
Change the verb form
make
show examples
people
back to normal life, there are
also
many drawbacks to make
people
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
lazy to find jobs and over using the systems which may lead
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
systems
crush
Wrong verb form
crushed
show examples
in near future.
Submitted by zoe20130402 on

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • controversial
  • critical thinking skills
  • technical expertise
  • entrepreneurship
  • self-employment
  • economic diversification
  • innovation
  • vocational training
  • academic education
  • employment landscape
  • blanket approach
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