The pie charts below show the percentage of electricity production by fuel source in France in 1990 and 2010

The pie charts below show the percentage of electricity production by fuel source in France in 1990 and 2010
Throughout our lives, we have been taught that
life
is a matter of winning or losing. If you aren’t winning
then
you are surely losing. To some extent that’s true. And that
concept
sometimes comes in another form ,
for instance
, you must get an A+ or you have to get accepted into
this
school.
This
sounds like a good motivational
concept
.
however
, it comes with a great cost. What if you didn’t manage to get the score you wanted or you didn’t get accepted to your dream college? The answer for most of us is, I will be sad, devastating but I will manage to move on easily. The truth is that
this
is not always the case, as sometimes you will not be able to move on and you will be stuck in that loss. And
that is
because most of us live our
life
with winning or losing
concept
which is dependent on achieving our goal and that sometimes can make you overwhelmed, even if you managed to achieve your goal as
life
will start to look like a field of battle to you, either you win by achieving your goal or you lose by not being able to achieve your goal. But, what if we walk through our lives with the
concept
of
values
? As
this
concept
will assure that you walk the road you want and live the
life
you value without being anxious about the outcome.
For example
, let’s say that you value being a devoted hard working person, when you don’t get the score you want, it’s unlikely that you will be upset as long as you keep your
values
.
Values
are the opposite of the winning or losing
concept
.
Values
are an endless road ,unlike goals. Having said that, to make sure that you keep your
values
you have to set some goals.
In contrast
to the previous
concept
, the only purpose of these goals is to make sure that you keep your
values
.
For instance
, in our previous example, to be a devoted hard working person I have to sleep and wake up early.
Submitted by m-not21 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "for instance".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Contractions: Don't use contractions.
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Vocabulary: Replace the words life, concept, values with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "move" was used 2 times.

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