Some people believe that violence on television and in computer games has a damaging effect on the society. Others deny that these factors have any significant influence on people's behaviour. What is your opinion?

Nowadays people have an opportunity to watch
Add an article
the video
a video
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video
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videos
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with any genre or theme.
Thus
people
also
bring up some questions about a damaging effect on
the
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apply
show examples
society and what consequences can it cause. First of all, I agree with the statement that some cruel
action
Fix the agreement mistake
actions
show examples
shown on television and in computer
games
have a damaging and traumatizing effect on some parts of
the
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apply
show examples
society. Many young people love playing computer
games
and can spend numerous amount of hours sitting and playing
it
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them
show examples
,
obviously
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,obviously
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there are a few
genre
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genres
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of
games
that shows us
the
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apply
show examples
violence
.
Therefore
, sitting at the computer and playing
some
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apply
show examples
violence
Replace the word
violent
show examples
games
can cause some changes in
person's
Correct article usage
a person's
show examples
brain and thoughts.
For example
, not conscious youth can try to copy
behavior
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behaviour
show examples
in some
violence
Replace the word
violent
show examples
videos or
games
, so they could think that they are
cool
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coolly
show examples
copying it.
However
, not only teenagers and
childrens
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children
show examples
can be affected by it.
Secondly
, many teenagers try to be like
villians
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villains
from the
games
or series. They are trying
some
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apply
show examples
alcohol, cigarettes and even drugs to feel like those characters, so it causes
lot
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a lot
show examples
of unpleasant consequences.
For example
,
young
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the young
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part of our society
romaticize
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romanticize
romanticized
smoking cigarettes or drinking alcohol, but they do not think about their actions, health and
behavior
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behaviour
show examples
. Personally, I think that adults should
explain
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toexplain
show examples
their children that it is wrong to behave like that and should not let them watch
violence
Replace the word
violent
show examples
movies and play
games
, because it will cause a damaging effect on their
personalitys
Correct your spelling
personality
personalities
and world outlook.
Submitted by eva.tokmakova12 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • pivotal
  • desensitize
  • catalyst
  • predisposed
  • harmless outlet
  • distinguish
  • controlled environments
  • empirical research
  • minimal or no direct correlation
  • socio-economic status
  • predisposition
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