Some people believe that violence on television and in computer games has a damaging effect on the society. Others deny that these factors have any significant influence on people's behaviour. What is your opinion?

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Nowadays people have an opportunity to watch
Add an article
the video
a video
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video
Fix the agreement mistake
videos
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with any genre or theme.
Thus
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people
also
Linking Words
bring up some questions about a damaging effect on
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society and what consequences can it cause. First of all, I agree with the statement that some cruel
action
Fix the agreement mistake
actions
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shown on television and in computer
games
Use synonyms
have a damaging and traumatizing effect on some parts of
the
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apply
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society. Many young people love playing computer
games
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and can spend numerous amount of hours sitting and playing
it
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them
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,
obviously
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,obviously
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there are a few
genre
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genres
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of
games
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that shows us
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
violence
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.
Therefore
Linking Words
, sitting at the computer and playing
some
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apply
show examples
Use synonyms
violence
Replace the word
violent
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games
Use synonyms
can cause some changes in
person's
Correct article usage
a person's
show examples
brain and thoughts.
For example
Linking Words
, not conscious youth can try to copy
behavior
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behaviour
show examples
in some
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violence
Replace the word
violent
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videos or
games
Use synonyms
, so they could think that they are
cool
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coolly
show examples
copying it.
However
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, not only teenagers and
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
can be affected by it.
Secondly
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, many teenagers try to be like
villians
Correct your spelling
villains
from the
games
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or series. They are trying
some
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apply
show examples
alcohol, cigarettes and even drugs to feel like those characters, so it causes
lot
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a lot
show examples
of unpleasant consequences.
For example
Linking Words
,
young
Correct article usage
the young
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part of our society
romaticize
Correct your spelling
romanticize
romanticized
smoking cigarettes or drinking alcohol, but they do not think about their actions, health and
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
. Personally, I think that adults should
explain
Add the preposition
toexplain
show examples
their children that it is wrong to behave like that and should not let them watch
Use synonyms
violence
Replace the word
violent
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movies and play
games
Use synonyms
, because it will cause a damaging effect on their
personalitys
Correct your spelling
personality
personalities
and world outlook.
Submitted by eva.tokmakova12 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • pivotal
  • desensitize
  • catalyst
  • predisposed
  • harmless outlet
  • distinguish
  • controlled environments
  • empirical research
  • minimal or no direct correlation
  • socio-economic status
  • predisposition
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