Something that is more important for children to engage in outdoor activities instead of playing video games. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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It is believed by some individuals that the little ones should be involved in different
activities
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while
Linking Words
growing.They
Add the comma(s)
, therefore,
show examples
therefore
Linking Words
opine that kids should participate in
outdoor
Add an article
an outdoor
the outdoor
show examples
exercise in place of playing video games.I fully agree with
this
Linking Words
view, and
this
Linking Words
essay will explain my position in detail. During the early
life
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of
children
Use synonyms
,it is important that they partake in
activities
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that will develop mental, psychological and emotional status.When young ones
participates
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participate
show examples
in outdoor procedures, especially with other kids, they
tends
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tend
show examples
to become more lively and confident in themselves.
This
Linking Words
boost
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boosts
show examples
their
self esteem
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self-esteem
show examples
to easily relate with others later in
life
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.
For example
Linking Words
,
children
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who engaged in exercises
out side
Correct your spelling
outside
show examples
are seen to be more outspoken and relate well with colleagues in the future,says
by
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to
show examples
United
Correct article usage
a United
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kingdom
Correct your spelling
Kingdom
show examples
reporter.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
children
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gets
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get
show examples
the opportunity to develop critical thinking when they partake in outdoor
activities
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.Ability to think and reason deeply is needed in all spheres of
life
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in other to be successful.
This
Linking Words
is built
while
Linking Words
children
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are growing up through
activities
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that have to do with solving
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
problems
such
Linking Words
as sudoku puzzles,
matching
Correct word choice
and matching
show examples
of words.If
children
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can be engaged in different social
activities
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
they are young
instead
Linking Words
of playing video games they will not find it difficult to
profer
Correct your spelling
proffer
show examples
solutions to issues of
life
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
,a child who has undergone
series
Correct article usage
a series
show examples
of outdoor
activities
Use synonyms
will be able to perform well with school arithmetic
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
. In conclusion,
children
Use synonyms
can be allowed to play video games during their free time;
however
Linking Words
,I fully agree that they should
participates
Change the verb form
participate
show examples
in outdoor
activities
Use synonyms
because it will help them to develop critical thinking,
anda
Correct your spelling
and
great
Add a missing verb
have great
show examples
self esteem
Add a hyphen
self-esteem
show examples
in the future.
Submitted by thomolaitan30 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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