IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The line graph below shows the population size, birth and death rate of England and Wales from 1700 to 2000. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words

The line graph below shows the population size, birth and death rate of England and Wales from 1700 to 2000. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words
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This
 image illustrates the number of people living in England and Wales and the
birth
 and
death
 rate per 1000 persons between 1700 and 2000.
Overall
, the
population
 size increases over the years in the United Kingdom
while
 the
birth
 and
death
rates
 remain stable. The main trend on the graph shows the
population
 growth in the UK of 50
million
 between 1700 and 2000.
However
, in 1750 there was an increase of 10
million
 but dropped approximately to 5
million
.
After
this
, the
population
 sharply increased peaking at 50
million
 in the year 2000.
On the other hand
,
birth
 and
death
rates
 fluctuate between 20/1000 and 40/1000 individuals. Both
rates
 increased from 1700 to 1750 remaining stable until 1800 staying around 38-39 per 1000. From that point, both
rates
 gradually decreased approximating 20/1000,
however
, the
birth
 rate increased in 2000
while
 the
death
 rate remained stable. In general, those two
rates
 haven't changed dramatically compared to the
population
 size.
Submitted by celinedoultremontt on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however, while".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words birth, death, population, rates, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "increases" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remain" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stable" was used 3 times.
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