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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Women and men are commonly seen as having different strengths and weaknesses. Is it right to exclude males or females from certain professions because of their gender?

#women #men #strengths #weaknesses #right #males #females #professions #gender
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Nowadays, most
men
Use synonyms
 and
women
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 have a profession, but some
of
Change preposition
apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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people
Use synonyms
 cannot get their ideal job because of their
gender
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. In my point of view, everyone has the right to choose what they want to be and what makes them happy.
First
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The first
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 point to consider is that every single person on the planet has the freedom to do what they enjoy doing and to set goals for themselves, and one should stop someone from working in his ideal job just by the person's
gender
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.
Men
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 and
women
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 have differences from each other, but both of them have their ways of thinking and acting, which can create amazing ideas and projects by cooperating together.
For example
Linking Words
, in
a
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apply
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building construction,
women
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 could not be as strong as
men
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 to carry heavy materials, but they will have a better perspective for a plant that will suit a future family living there.
Last
Linking Words
 but not least,
people
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 can never underestimate anyone by their looks, characteristics or
gender
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. Normally
people
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 that apply for a job
that is
Linking Words
 unusual for their
gender
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 are goal-setters,
this
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 means
people
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 with an objective and dreams to achieve, so they probably worked very hard for it.
For instance
Linking Words
, most
women
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 are better at cooking than
men
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, but in many
people
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’s views Gordon Ramsy is the best chef in the world, and he is a man.
Afterall
Correct your spelling
After all
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,
people
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 always talk about
gender
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 equality, but for
me
Add a comma
,me
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 the most important thing is to show it by actions we do
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
.
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • gender stereotypes
  • societal views
  • inherent biases
  • professional capabilities
  • gender inclusivity
  • equal opportunities
  • diversity
  • unique perspectives
  • physical attributes
  • psychological attributes
  • workplace adaptations
  • modern advancements
  • legal frameworks
  • gender discrimination
  • ethical implications
  • career opportunities
  • case studies
  • real-world examples
  • traditionally dominated
  • successful outcomes
  • atypical roles
What to do next:
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