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Writing Samples
Band 7

The graph shows the amount earned by graduates of different age groups in 2002. It includes those with a degree, those with a higher degree (postgraduate) and those with other qualifications. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph shows the amount earned by graduates of different age groups in 2002. It includes those with a degree, those with a higher degree (postgraduate) and those with other qualifications. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#amount #graduates #age #groups #qualifications #information #features #comparisons
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The graph displays the salaries of full-time graduate employees across different
age
Use synonyms
 groups, ranging from 21-25 years old to 56-60 years old. The vertical axis shows weekly
earnings
Use synonyms
 in pounds, ranging from £300 to £900.
Overall
Linking Words
, the data indicates that the weekly
earnings
Use synonyms
 of employees increase steadily from the youngest
age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
 up to middle
age
Use synonyms
, before fluctuating and tapering off slightly.
Earnings
Use synonyms
 rise consistently until the 36-40
age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
 for those with a first degree and other qualifications, reaching peaks of around £700 and slightly above £800, respectively.
After
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 peak, the weekly salaries of those in the 'Others' category fall below £700,
while
Linking Words
 the
earnings
Use synonyms
 of individuals with a first degree remain relatively stable until the oldest
age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
.
Linking Words
Although
Correct word choice
However
show examples
 the employees with Higher
degree
Fix the agreement mistake
degrees
show examples
 reach a peak
approximately
Change preposition
of approximately
show examples
 800
pound
Change to a plural noun
pounds
show examples
 in the 56-60
age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
. Their salaries rose steadily up to
41
Correct article usage
the 41
show examples
-45
age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
, after which declined consistently until the 51-55
age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by acaitaz on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words age, earnings, group with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
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