The table below gives information about employment rates and the average annual salary of new graduates from an Australian university in 2009. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Graduate employment rates and average annual salary (2009)

#information #employment #rates #salary #graduates #australian #university #summarise #features #comparisons #graduate

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The table provides information on the

employment

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rates and average annual

salaries

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of new

graduates

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from an Australian university in 2009, categorized by their areas of study. Notable features and comparisons emerge from the data. The field of Health stands out with the highest

employment

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rate of 93%. Law and Engineering/I.T. follow closely with 87% and 86%

employment

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rates, respectively.

In contrast

Linking Words

, Business lags significantly, with only an 18%

employment

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rate. Regarding average annual

salaries

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, Law and Engineering/I.T.

graduates

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lead at $59,000 per year,

while

Linking Words

Business

graduates

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, despite a lower

employment

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rate, earn $52,000 annually. Art and Social Sciences

graduates

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make $50,000 per year,

whereas

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Science

graduates

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have the lowest average salary at $39,000. In conclusion, pursuing degrees in Health, Law, or Engineering/I.T. appear promising in terms of higher

employment

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rates and better

salaries

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Graduates

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in the Business field may face challenges finding

employment

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, but those who do secure competitive

salaries

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. Art and Social Sciences

graduates

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also

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find reasonably well-paying jobs.

Graduates

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should consider their passions and career goals when choosing their fields of study.

Submitted by mirnahamada on Tue Jul 25 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 77%.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words employment, salaries, graduates with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

175 words

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