The line graph below shows changes in the youth unemployment rate from 2000 to 2012. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph below shows changes in the youth unemployment rate from 2000 to 2012. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The line graph compares how the
unemployment
rate
among young people aged 15-24 changed over a 12-year period (2000-2012) in five European countries.
Overall
, the
rate
of
unemployment
grew noticeably in all European countries with the exception of Germany. Of particular note are Italy and Germany, where
unemployment
rates were highest and lowest respectively for the better part of the period. In detail,
youth
unemployment
underwent a drastic rise in Britain and Sweden. In 2000, the
rate
of
unemployment
stood at 10% in Britain, which had doubled by 2008.
This
figure grew to about 27% in 2009, but it had fallen to a quarter three years later.
Similarly
, Sweden
also
saw its
youth
unemployment
rate
climb ,
initially
the percentage stood at just over a tenth, and it had gone up twofold by the end of the period. The figures for the other countries
also
changed, albeit to a varying degree. The proportion of unemployed
youth
was just under 30% in Italy in 2000, which dropped to a fifth in 2008.
This
was followed by an exponential rise, hitting an all-time high of nearly 36% in 2012. The
unemployment
rate
among young people
also
went up in France, going from 20% in 2000 to 25% in 2012.
Finally
, despite some fluctuations, the
rate
of
youth
unemployment
remained unchanged in Germany, at about 10%.
Submitted by mhmdkhlwd98 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
Vocabulary: Replace the words unemployment, rate, youth with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "changed" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "rise" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "stood" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: