IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The chart below shows the percentage in the share of international students among university graduates in different Canadian provinces between 2001 and 2006. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the percentage in the share of international students among university graduates in different Canadian provinces between 2001 and 2006. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#percentage #students #university #graduates #canadian #provinces #summarise #information #features #comparisons
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The following illustration depicts the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of international
students
Use synonyms
 in different Canadian provinces in 2001 and 2006. The graph shows the following cities New Brunswick, Nova Scotia, Quebec, Alberta, British Columbia, Manitoba, Newfoundland and Labrador,
lastly
Linking Words
 Ontario.
Overall
Linking Words
, we can observe that the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
students
Use synonyms
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased in every
city
Use synonyms
 in 2006, except
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the
city
Use synonyms
 of Alberto.
Also
Linking Words
, the highest number of international
students
Use synonyms
 in both 2001 and 2006 visited the universities in New Brunswick. More than 10% of
graduates
Use synonyms
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
visited the
city
Use synonyms
 of New Brunswick in 2006,
this
Linking Words
percentage
Use synonyms
 was slightly less in 2001, that's why about 7% of
grauduates
Correct your spelling
graduates
 were from other countries. Nova Scotia and British Columbia had the same
percentage
Use synonyms
 of international
students
Use synonyms
 in 2006.
However
Linking Words
, in 2001 Nova Scotia's
percentage
Use synonyms
 was higher (around 6%),
British
Correct word choice
and British
show examples
 Columbia had almost 5% the same year. More than 5% of the
graduates
Use synonyms
 of the
city
Use synonyms
 of Quebec were international in both years (around 6% in 2001;
almost
Correct word choice
and almost
show examples
 10% in 2006). Alberta had more international
graduates
Use synonyms
 in 2001, it made up exactly 5% of all
graduates
Use synonyms
, but in 2006
this
Linking Words
 number
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
slightly decreased, it made up around 3%. Universities in Ontario had increased their
percentage
Use synonyms
 of international
students
Use synonyms
 in 2006. Like in the universities in Newfoundland and Labrador.
Submitted by Ayan on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, students, city, graduates with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 6 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: