The line graph shows the percentage of people of different age groups and how they rate a set of factors in terms of importance when buying a new home. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
#line #percentage #people #age #groups #rate #factors #terms #importance #home #information #features #comparisons
The line graph above depicts the important things when
people
want to buy their house by different groups of age. The figures are given in per cent (%), the factors are such
as school, crime rate, etc. In Brief, all of the age group concerns crime
rate the most Correct article usage
the crime
while
schools reduced
Wrong verb form
reduce
when
the Correct pronoun usage
it when
people
are older.
It is clear that
the largest concern factor of everyone is crime
rate when they want to own a home which was above 75% in all age groups, meanwhile shopping facilities, parks, and public transport are the things Correct article usage
the crime
people
were more
concerned Correct quantifier usage
most
when
they got older which the numbers from nearly 12 in 25 to 34 Change preposition
about when
years
old to around 25 in 55 to 64 years
old.
In
Change preposition
On
other
hand, Correct article usage
the other
shools
Correct your spelling
schools
was
the Change the verb form
were
factors
that Fix the agreement mistake
factor
decline
when the citizens were older over the period which Wrong verb form
declined
approximately
from 50 in 25 to 34 Add a missing verb
was approximately
years
old to around 25 in 55 to 64 years
old.
All in all, the government should facilitate the
security the most if Correct article usage
apply
the
want Correct your spelling
they
people
to buy a home.Submitted by ChampJT on
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people, years with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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