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Band 6.5

The graphs below give information about coputer ownership as a percentage of the population between 2002 and 2010, and by level of education for the years 2002 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.

The graphs below give information about coputer ownership as a percentage of the population between 2002 and 2010, and by level of education for the years 2002 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.
#graphs #information #coputer #ownership #percentage #population #level #education #years #summarise #features #comparison
The diagrams illustrated the
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
show examples
 of people
own
Wrong verb form
who owned
show examples
 their computers during the
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
 2002 and 2010, and
also
 by the different education in 2002 and
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
2010. Generally, using the
screen
Fix the agreement mistake
screens
show examples
 as property increased
year
 by
year
 and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
higher education own them much more than the lower. In the
year
2002
Add a comma
,2002
show examples
 it was over 50 per
cent
residents
Change preposition
of residents
show examples
own
Wrong verb form
owned
show examples
 their computer and the rate rose
about
Change preposition
by about
show examples
 10 per
cent
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
every 2
year
Change to a plural noun
years
show examples
. The rate almost reached 80 per
cent
 of the population in 2010
It is clear that
 people own their computers
depended
Change the form of the verb
depending
show examples
 on their level of education. It is about 15 in 100 people
didn’t
Correct pronoun usage
who didn’t
show examples
 graduate high school
own
Correct your spelling
on
show examples
 their computers in 2002
while
 a bit more than 40 in 100 in 2010. And
also
 noticeable
diferently
Correct your spelling
differently
the
propotion
Correct your spelling
proportion
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
postgraduate qualifications was 2 in 3 in
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
2002 compared with approximately 100 per
cent
 in 2010.
Submitted by duyuyen18 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words year, cent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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