IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

You recently stayed in a hotel in a large city. The weather was very unusual for the time of year and the heating / cooling system in the hotel was quite inadequate. Write a letter to the manager of the hotel. In your letter: give details of what went wrong explain what you had to do to overcome the problem at the time say what action you would like the manager to take

#hotel #city #weather #time #year #system #manager #action
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Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to express my dissatisfaction towards your
hotel
Use synonyms
 facility in Alaska. I stayed in
Royal
Correct article usage
the Royal
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 Suit of ABC
Hotel
Use synonyms
 on October 20, 2023. I was in the city to attend a business conference on next day. At night, the climate had changed in the area to extremely hot which is unusual for the time. I have tried to decrease the temperature of the air conditioning system,
however
Linking Words
, it was not working beyond 20 degrees Celsius. I complained to reception about the issue and they promised
me
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
to send the technician to fix it, but
unfortunately
Add a comma
unfortunately,
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 it won't turn up.
Therefore
Linking Words
 checked out of the
hotel
Use synonyms
 immediately. Despite
high
Add an article
the high
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 price, I stayed at another
hotel
Use synonyms
 opposite your establishment that night. I am requesting you to refund my
hotel
Use synonyms
 booking amount without any deduction. I look forward to hearing from you. Yours sincerely, Jennifer Ramos
Submitted by ck.manshad on

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coherence cohesion
Provide more specific details about what went wrong with the heating / cooling system and how it impacted your stay.
coherence cohesion
Avoid using informal language and maintain a professional tone throughout the letter.
coherence cohesion
Organize your ideas into paragraphs to improve clarity and coherence.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your letter follows the format of a formal letter, including a proper greeting and closing.
task achievement
Provide a more detailed explanation of what you had to do to overcome the problem at the time.
task achievement
Clearly state what specific action you would like the manager to take in response to the issue.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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