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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The graph below shows the consumption of fish and some different kinds of meat in a European country between 1979 and 2004. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.

The graph below shows the consumption of fish and some different kinds of meat in a European country between 1979 and 2004. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.
#consumption #fish #kinds #meat #european #country #summarise #information #features #comparison
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Given is a graph indicating some information regarding the number of British students at one university in England who were able to speak other
languages
Use synonyms
in addition
Linking Words
 to English
such
Linking Words
 as French only,
German
Use synonyms
 only,
Spanish
Use synonyms
 only, another language, two other
languages
Use synonyms
, and no other
languages
Use synonyms
 over a
period
Use synonyms
 of ten years. The propitiation of other
languages
Use synonyms
 is measured in
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 (P).
Overall
Linking Words
, over the surveyed
period
Use synonyms
, in 2000 the least significant rate of spoken language is
German
Use synonyms
 only and two other
languages
Use synonyms
 and the highest number of spoken language is
Spanish
Use synonyms
 only. In 2010 the
least
Correct word choice
lowest
show examples
proportions
Fix the agreement mistake
proportion
show examples
 of spoken
languages
Use synonyms
is
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
 no other
languages
Use synonyms
 French
only
Rephrase
apply
show examples
and
German
Use synonyms
 only
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the same degree, and the highest rate
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
Spanish
Use synonyms
 only same as 2010
period
Use synonyms
. No other
languages
Use synonyms
 percentage decreased from 20% to 10% in 2000 to 2010. The French only decreased by 5% between 2000 and 2010. The figure for
Use synonyms
German
Correct article usage
the German
show examples
only
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
rate remained fairly stable at around 10%
all
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
throughout the given
period
Use synonyms
. The
Spanish
Use synonyms
 only increased by 5% between 2000 and 2010.
Another
Replace the adjective
Another language
Other languages
show examples
languages
Use synonyms
 and two other
languages
Use synonyms
 rates witnessed an
increasing
Replace the word
increase
show examples
 of 5% The figure from
German
Use synonyms
 only, French only and no other
languages
Use synonyms
 number remained fairly stable at around 10% during the 2010
periods
Fix the agreement mistake
period
show examples
. But other pro petitions have changed over time.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words languages, german, spanish, period with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stable" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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