The line chart below shows the percentage of of people in different age groups who played video games more than ten hours a week between 1984 and 2003

The line chart below shows the percentage of of people in different age groups who played video games more than ten hours a week between 1984 and 2003
This
chart illustrates the number in per cent of people who play video games based on the ages from 2010 to 2015. It is divided into 5 groups,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
are
age
groups between 16 to 24, 25 to 44, 45 to 54, 55 to 64, and above 75.
Overall
, it is shown that the highest number of video games player comes from the life
class
between 16 to 24, except in 2010 where the highest came from the life
class
between 45 - 54 Based on each
class
, the graph shows the growth of each
class
, where the life
group
above 75 is always placed in the fifth
position
. The fourth
position
is always placed by the
age
group
between 55 to 64 where the percentage is steady in the range of 21 to 30, and the third
position
is placed by the
age
group
between 25 to 44 with values between 30 to 45
which
Correct your spelling
with
show examples
the highest value being in 2015. The second
position
mostly placed by the
age
group
of 45 to 55, but in 2010,
this
group
was placed in the first
position
with a value is 52% .
Finally
, the first
position
is placed by the
age
group
between 16 to 24, which the growth of the percentages is shown to increase every year.
Submitted by rlsatria on

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Vocabulary: Replace the words age, class, group, position with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 2 times.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • fluctuate
  • trend
  • percentage
  • age group
  • consistent
  • significant
  • decline
  • increase
  • peak
  • plateau
  • demographic
  • upward trend
  • downward trend
  • proportion
  • level off
  • escalate
  • diminish
  • interval
  • duration
  • prevalence
  • participation
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