Nowadays, more people move away from their friends and families for work. Does this development have more advantages or disadvantages? Two of each at least
As our world is becoming increasingly globalized, individuals are now more willing and able to find employment opportunities far from their birthplaces than at any other point in our history.
Although
Linking Words
this
trend has certain drawbacks, I believe the advantages are greater.
Several downsides associated with the mobility of Linking Words
labor
are clear. The most obvious one is Change the spelling
labour
separation
of families and friends. To explain, Add an article
the separation
a separation
people
who move to another country for Use synonyms
work
may not be able Use synonyms
come
Add the particle
to come
home
often to visit their relatives. Strong friendships can Use synonyms
also
fade if friends do not meet regularly. Linking Words
For example
, Egyptians who live and Linking Words
work
in the UAE usually have one month annually to see their friends and families. Use synonyms
Thus
/Linking Words
therefore
/Linking Words
hence
, those who move and those who stay become lonelier. From an economic perspective, local companies may suffer from a lack of experienced Linking Words
labor
. If too many Change the spelling
labour
people
choose to Use synonyms
work
abroad, local businesses will deteriorate. Use synonyms
Although
all these disadvantages must be acknowledged, in most Linking Words
cases
they are outweighed by the financial benefits of working away.
Today, Add a comma
cases,
people
from less-developed regions or areas can relocate to more prosperous cities or countries with higher salaries and better career opportunities. Use synonyms
Although
perhaps lonelier, those individuals can improve their own standard of living Linking Words
as well as
that of their families back Linking Words
home
, to whom they usually send money. A prominent example can be seen in the Gulf countries, where many expatriates send family expenses on a monthly basis. Use synonyms
In addition
, after working away for several years, some will return Linking Words
home
. With savings and new skills, they may Use synonyms
then
be able to establish new businesses or find jobs they could not get before, helping to develop their Linking Words
home
region. Use synonyms
Thus
, what can be said is that relocating for Linking Words
work
can help Use synonyms
people
improve their own financial situation Use synonyms
as well as
contribute to the development of their homeland.
In conclusion, for many Linking Words
people
, the ability to move within national boards or abroad to find better career opportunities is an enormous advantage because, in most cases, it leads to more economic prosperity. Use synonyms
Although
they may have to leave Linking Words
people
they are close to, and their absence can make it harder for companies in their Use synonyms
home
regions to find employees, I still believe that the advantages of Use synonyms
this
trend are far more significant than its drawbacks.Linking Words
Submitted by ahmed.nabih.salem on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
Ensure all paragraphs are well-organized with clear topic sentences. While the logical structure is generally good, some paragraphs could benefit from more explicit topic sentences to guide the reader.
coherence cohesion
Maintain the use of cohesive devices, and ensure they are varied and aptly placed to enhance the flow of ideas.
task achievement
Your essay provides a clear position and covers the task sufficiently. However, for a higher score, ensure that your main ideas are expanded with more detailed explanations and a variety of examples.
task achievement
For an improved response, ensure the full development of ideas with multiple examples, as they currently lack depth and variety, which could limit the score. Aim to include specific and detailed examples that reinforce your arguments.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.