The pie charts give information about the proportoin males and females in employment in six categories divided into manualand non-manual occupations

#information #proportoin #males #females #employment #six #categories #manualand #occupations

The rendered set of pie charts illustrates the proportion of males and

females

in employment in six different categories

also

divided into manual and non-manual occupations.

Overall

, it is clearly seen that both genders were highly employed in managerial and professional,

whereas

the lowest

per cent

Correct your spelling

percentage

show examples

females

was in general labours.

According to

the given data, the largest percentile of men were employed in managerial and professional jobs 36%. Followed by female 29%.

Moreover

, there was a difference of 1% between both the sexes in manual and non-manual categories.

Furthermore

, individuals showed the least interest in general labourers. Moving

further

, a 21% increment has been

showing

Wrong verb form

shown

show examples

in craft activity by men as compared to women. Meanwhile, in other non-manual activities,

females

were 9% as well males were 6% who were involved.

Lastly

, 31% of

females

were in clerical or related activities.

Submitted by svmaibcamaibs on Thu Nov 30 2023

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 69%.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words females with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

142 words

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The pie charts give information about the proportoin males and females in employment in six categories divided into manualand non-manual occupations

One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In the past it was only possible to contact people at home by letter or telephone. Nowadays, mobile devices mean that we can communicate with people anywhere and at any time. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people believe that social media sites, such as Facebook or Twitter, have a negative impact on young people and their ability to form personal relationships. Others believe that these sites bring people together in a beneficial way.

In some countries, most people prefer to rent a house rather than buy their houses. What are the advantages of renting a home? Should governments subsidies house prices for first home buyers?