IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

The charts below give information about the world’s top three producers of four different dairy products in 2012. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below give information about the world’s top three producers of four different dairy products in 2012. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #world’s #three #producers #four #dairy #products #summarise #features #comparisons
The graph presents data about
quantity
Add an article
the quantity
show examples
 of
milk
 and products made from
milk
 of
three
Correct article usage
the three
show examples
 largest manufacturers in the
world
 in 2012 It can be seen that
European
Correct article usage
the European
show examples
 Union was the biggest producer of
milk
 and cheese. It
also
 ranked second and third in the
world
 about butter and
milk
 power respectively. Speaking of
milk
,
European
Correct article usage
the European
show examples
 Union produced 142970
MT
 in 2012 and ranked 1st in the
world
. These were followed by India and
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 States,
produced
Correct pronoun usage
which produced
show examples
 127000
MT
 and 90038
MT
 respectively. Similar to
milk
,
EU
Correct article usage
the EU
show examples
also
 manufactured the largest amount of cheese in the
world
 (7120
MT
). And United States ranked second with 4925
MT
. The third was Brazill just produced 700
MT
. Apart from the aforementioned products, butter was made by three manufacturers including India,
EU
Correct article usage
the EU
show examples
 and
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 States with
Add an article
the quantity
a quantity
show examples
quantity
Fix the agreement mistake
quantities
show examples
 of 7500
MT
, 2040
MT
 and 810
MT
 respectively.
Finally
, the
last
 product of four different dairy products was
Milk
 Power which
most
Add a missing verb
was most
show examples
 produced by China with 1200
MT
 and followed by New Zealand, EU with 1110
MT
, 770
MT
 respectively.
Submitted by weezel on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words milk, world, mt with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Dairy products
  • Producers
  • Cheese
  • Butter
  • Skimmed milk powder
  • Whole milk powder
  • Global production
  • Metric tonnes
  • Leading
  • Specialize
  • Volume
  • Trends
  • Geographical distribution
  • Significant
  • Comparisons
  • Dominate
  • Sector
  • Diversity
  • Contribution
  • Agricultural output
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