IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The line graph shows the changes in the number of overseas tourists in three different regions (coast, lakes, and mountains) in each country in Europe. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and making comparisons where relevant.

The line graph shows the changes in the number of overseas tourists in three different regions (coast, lakes, and mountains) in each country in Europe. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and making comparisons where relevant.
#line #changes #tourists #three #regions #coast #lakes #mountains #country #europe #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The line graph demonstrates us information about
tourists
, who
are visited
Change the verb form
have visited
show examples
 three different regions in
in
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
Europe in 20 year period. The data is given
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 thousands of
people
.
Overall
, as
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can be seen from the graph the coast is the most popular destination and
shown
Add a missing verb
has shown
show examples
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
significant growth, the same trend can be seen in
the mountains fans
Change to a genitive case
the fans of the mountain
show examples
, but it went up
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
slightly. The
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of
tourists
, who preferred the lakes
demostrated
Correct your spelling
demonstrated
 a substantial jump in the beginning, but it
droped
Correct your spelling
dropped
 dramatically in the end.
To begin
 with, in 1987 the amount of
tourists
 in the mountains started from 10000
people
,
then
 reached a peak in 2002
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 about 75000
people
 and plummeted to 50000
people
 in 2007. The
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of
tourists
 who went to the coast began from 40000 in 1987 with a slight drop in 1992 and
then
 it
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
gradually rocketed to 75000 in 2007.
Also
Add a comma
Also,
show examples
 there was an upturn trend in the period given from
tourists
 who preferred the mountains with 20000
people
 in the
beginnig
Correct your spelling
beginning
 and about 35000 in the end.
Submitted by roker123456 on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words tourists, people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "droped" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
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