The diagram below shows how rain water is collected and then treated to be used as drinking water in an Australian town. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

#rain #water #australian #town #summarise #information #features #comparisons

The diagram illustrates by which

rain

Correct your spelling

rainwater

show examples

water

is processed before it is ready to be consumed by a certain citizen in Australia. In general, there are several stages involved in the process,

started

Wrong verb form

starting

show examples

Change preposition

with

show examples

collecting rainwater and

ended

Wrong verb form

ending

show examples

Change preposition

with

show examples

using

chemical

Fix the agreement mistake

chemicals

show examples

before it is ready to be consumed.

According to

the diagram, the process involves

natural

Correct article usage

a natural

show examples

phenomenon,

Change preposition

apply

show examples

which

it is

Verb problem

apply

show examples

started

Wrong verb form

starts

show examples

when rain

is falling

Wrong verb form

falls

show examples

. Following that, the rainwater is

being

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

collected and pipes are used to help the

water

flows

Correct subject-verb agreement

flow

show examples

to the

water

filter. In

this

filter, other particles

Change the verb form

are

show examples

being separated from the

water

. After the filtration, the

water

is stored in a reservoir before it is ready to be transferred to the

water

treatment. In

this

treatment,

chemical

Add an article

the chemical

a chemical

show examples

is used to precipitate other particles that

left

Add a missing verb

are left

show examples

in the

water

Finally

, the

water

is ready to be consumed

for

Change preposition

show examples

public

Add an article

the public

show examples

such

as for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

residence

Fix the agreement mistake

residences

show examples

, hospitals,

school

Fix the agreement mistake

schools

show examples

, or other public facilities.

Submitted by misstiasclassroom on Thu Dec 21 2023

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words water with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "diagram" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

▼

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

154 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The diagram below shows how rain water is collected and then treated to be used as drinking water in an Australian town. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems as well as practical problems. Do you agree or disagree with this idea?

Some people think that the main purpose of schools is to turn children into good citizens and workers, rather than to benefit them as individuals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think it would be a good idea for schools to teach every young person how to be a good parent. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Describe the skills a person needs to be a good parent.