IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The two line graphs below show New Zealand import figures from Australia and Japan in the years 1994 - 2004. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The charts illustrate the cost of imported products to New
Zealand
Use synonyms
 from two different countries;
Japan
Use synonyms
 and
Australia
Use synonyms
. It
also
Linking Words
 distributes the changes over 10 years from 1994 to 2004, using the measurement of
million
Use synonyms
 New
Zealand
Use synonyms
 Dollars.
Overall
Linking Words
, the money spent on imports from both nations varied through the decade,
however
Linking Words
, at the beginning and the end of
this
Linking Words
 period, Australian goods were purchased more than Japanese ones. In 1994,
Australia
Use synonyms
 exported services of 4000
million
Use synonyms
 to New
Zealand
Use synonyms
, which was a net of 100
million
Use synonyms
 higher than the Japanese exports.
Then
Linking Words
 both countries achieved a significant rise reaching a peak of more than 600
million
Use synonyms
 approximately in 1996. Following that, both industries experienced a drop in 1999,
while
Linking Words
 about 4000
million
Use synonyms
 were imported from
Japan
Use synonyms
, the decrease reached 3000
million
Use synonyms
 coming from
Australia
Use synonyms
.
In contrast
Linking Words
, another increase was marked in 2000 in
Japan
Use synonyms
, when it hit 6000
million
Use synonyms
 again, followed by a drastic downward graph until 2004, which is the time that
Japan
Use synonyms
 exported the lowest rates of all years by 2000
million
Use synonyms
 only.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, a higher rate was scored between 2000 and 2001 in
Australia
Use synonyms
, reaching more than 7000
million
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 was followed by a slight drop in 2002, when
Australia
Use synonyms
 sold products valued at 5000
million
Use synonyms
. To New
Zealand
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
Australia
Use synonyms
's figure went through a dramatic upgrade scores reaching the highest importing amounts of 8000
million
Use synonyms
 in 2004.
Submitted by makahlehaseel on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
▼
Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words zealand, japan, australia, million with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "drop" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • trend analysis
  • fluctuations
  • peaks
  • troughs
  • significant changes
  • consistency
  • variations
  • overall growth
  • decline
  • diverge
  • converge
  • spiked
  • economic policies
  • trade agreements
  • global economic events
  • predictive insights
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