IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The chart below illustrates the children, men, women rate who ate five portions of fruit and vegatables daily in the UK between 2001 and 2008.

The chart below illustrates the children, men, women rate who ate five portions of fruit and vegatables daily in the UK between 2001 and 2008.
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The bar chart specifies
amount
Add an article
the amount
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 of children, men, and women who ate five portions of fruit and vegetable daily
throughout
Change preposition
between
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 2001 and 2008.
Overall
Linking Words
,
largest
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the largest
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 portion is always eaten by women, with men coming in second. Consistently, children always ranked
last
Linking Words
.
Throguhout
Correct your spelling
Throughout
 the years, the amount
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
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of
vegetable
Fix the agreement mistake
vegetables
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 eaten has increased for all three categories. From 2001 to 2006, the amount eaten by men and women has a sizeable gap. The gap dropped to around 3-4 the following year.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Demographic groups
  • Consumption rates
  • Significant increase/decrease
  • Stable or fluctuating intake
  • Dietary recommendations
  • Public health campaigns
  • Availability of fresh produce
  • Health outcomes
  • Obesity rates
  • Heart disease
  • Diet-related conditions
  • Further research
  • Public health policy
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