IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The diagrams below show the life cycle of the silkwort and the stages in the production of silk cloth. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagrams below show the life cycle of the silkwort and the stages in the production of silk cloth. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The two provided graphs demonstrate the
silkworm
Use synonyms
's life cycle and the procedure of silk cloth creation.
Overall
Linking Words
, the duration of a
silkworm
Use synonyms
's life rotation from eggs to moth is months, with the set of stages from
silkworm
Use synonyms
 lava formation to a cocoon.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the production of silk requires steps of selecting, boiling, unwinding, twisting, and weaving,
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
supported by additional tools. The periodicity of
Use synonyms
silkworm's
Correct article usage
a silkworm's
show examples
 life begins with an egg which is nurtured for 10 days by a moth. It
then
Linking Words
 continued with a crack which emitted a
silkworm
Use synonyms
 larva.
Then
Linking Words
, they consume mulberry leaf from the range of a month to 6 weeks until a
fiber
Change the spelling
fibre
show examples
 comes to the surface of it.
The next step is
Linking Words
 that the filament, which was maintained for 3 to 8 days, transformed into a cocoon which
then
Linking Words
 became a moth in 16 days. The manufacture of silk fabric starts
initially
Linking Words
 by selecting the qualified cocoon and boiling it with scorching water.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, it has to
be unwind
Change the verb form
be unwound
show examples
 until it shows approximately 300 to 900 meters of
strand
Add an article
the strand
show examples
.
Finally
Linking Words
, twist it with a pot filled with dye and weave it.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words silkworm with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: