IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

You recently bought a piece of equipment for your kitchen but it did not work. You pho0ned the shop but no action was taken. Write a letter to the shop manager. In your letter ● describe the problem with the equipment ● explain what happened when you phoned the ● say what you would like the manager to do.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Dear Sir, I have
a
Add a missing verb
been a
show examples
loyal customer
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
 your shop for years, and I never had any
issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
show examples
 until I bought a juicer from your shop
last
Linking Words
 week. I used it once
then
Linking Words
 it stopped working all of
sudden
Correct article usage
a sudden
show examples
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, I tried to call customer service, but they could not solve the issue.
Thus
Linking Words
, I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to bring your attention to
this
Linking Words
 issue. when I called at store, one of
service
Add an article
the service
show examples
 members picked
my
Change preposition
up my
show examples
 call.
Then
Linking Words
, I was asked to identify the
modle
Correct your spelling
model
module
 number and the brand of the juicer. I provided them with all
required
Correct article usage
the required
show examples
 details to verify the purchase. The technician suggested that it might be
result
Add an article
the result
a result
show examples
 of excessive use and I should wait until it
get
Change the verb form
gets
show examples
 cool down.
Then
Linking Words
, he hung up on me, and the juicer
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
 still not working, yet. I would say that I am disappointed with the
serrvice
Correct your spelling
service
 and I did not expect it. I want you to either send a mechanic to my house to fix it or I want a refund of my money. It is very important that it should be fixed as soon as possible because I need it every morning to prepare juice
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 my breakfast. I am looking forward to hearing back from you. Kind Regards Yudhveer

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
To improve the logical structure, ensure that each paragraph has a clear central theme and that the progression from one paragraph to the next is smooth and logical.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph contains a single main idea and expand on that idea with relevant details or examples for better clarity and impact.
task achievement
You have presented the main points of the task. To enhance the task response, provide more details about the equipment problem, share more specifics about the phone call, and clarify your desired outcome.
task achievement
Maintain a polite and formal tone throughout the letter as this demonstrates an understanding of the appropriate register for the task. Be careful with expressions that can be seen as informal or overly emotional.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • malfunctioning
  • defective
  • warranty
  • receipt
  • customer service
  • diagnose
  • troubleshooting
  • unsatisfactory
  • resolution
  • acknowledgement
  • immediate attention
  • inconvenience
  • appliance
  • follow-up
  • rectify
  • compensation
  • escalate
What to do next:
Look at other essays: