You recently bought a piece of equipment for your kitchen but it did not work. You pho0ned the shop but no action was taken. Write a letter to the shop manager. In your letter ● describe the problem with the equipment ● explain what happened when you phoned the ● say what you would like the manager to do.

#piece #equipment #kitchen #work #pho #shop #action #manager

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Dear Sir, I have

Add a missing verb

been a

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loyal customer

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your shop for years, and I never had any

issue

Fix the agreement mistake

issues

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until I bought a juicer from your shop

last

Linking Words

week. I used it once

then

Linking Words

it stopped working all of

sudden

Correct article usage

a sudden

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Moreover

Linking Words

, I tried to call customer service, but they could not solve the issue.

Thus

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, I am writing

this

Linking Words

letter to bring your attention to

this

Linking Words

issue. when I called at store, one of

service

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the service

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members picked

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up my

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call.

Then

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, I was asked to identify the

modle

Correct your spelling

model

module

number and the brand of the juicer. I provided them with all

required

Correct article usage

the required

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details to verify the purchase. The technician suggested that it might be

result

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the result

a result

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of excessive use and I should wait until it

get

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gets

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cool down.

Then

Linking Words

, he hung up on me, and the juicer

Wrong verb form

was

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still not working, yet. I would say that I am disappointed with the

serrvice

Correct your spelling

service

and I did not expect it. I want you to either send a mechanic to my house to fix it or I want a refund of my money. It is very important that it should be fixed as soon as possible because I need it every morning to prepare juice

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for

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my breakfast. I am looking forward to hearing back from you. Kind Regards Yudhveer

Submitted by yudhveer4890 on Wed Jan 31 2024

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coherence cohesion

To improve the logical structure, ensure that each paragraph has a clear central theme and that the progression from one paragraph to the next is smooth and logical.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph contains a single main idea and expand on that idea with relevant details or examples for better clarity and impact.

task achievement

You have presented the main points of the task. To enhance the task response, provide more details about the equipment problem, share more specifics about the phone call, and clarify your desired outcome.

task achievement

Maintain a polite and formal tone throughout the letter as this demonstrates an understanding of the appropriate register for the task. Be careful with expressions that can be seen as informal or overly emotional.

5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

7 paragraphs

213 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

malfunctioning
defective
warranty
receipt
customer service
diagnose
troubleshooting
unsatisfactory
resolution
acknowledgement
immediate attention
inconvenience
appliance
follow-up
rectify
compensation
escalate

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