The line graph below gives information about the percentage of women aged 15-64 in employment between 2003 and 2009.

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The following maps illustrate the current industrial district in Norbiton city and the residential district which will be developed in the future, replacing the latter.

Overall

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

part of the side of Norbiton City will be undergoing massive changes, currently, it is surrounded by factories and it will all be replaced by housing and necessary facilities

such

Linking Words

as hospitals, schools, and shops. First of all, in the centre

area

Use synonyms

just before the large roundabout, a new smaller roundabout will be built to control traffic flow in and out of the

area

Use synonyms

. Just after entering the large roundabout, various shops will be put together, so the residents can buy their household items near

homes

Correct pronoun usage

their homes

show examples

. On the opposite of the new shopping

area

Use synonyms

, southeast of the large roundabout, a new healthcare

center

Change the spelling

centre

show examples

will be established to provide immediate treatment for the people.

Lastly

Linking Words

, in the north

area

Use synonyms

of the large roundabout, there will be a new road and a bridge constructed over the river to connect the new housing

area

Use synonyms

beside the farmland. Meanwhile, the existing long road on the east side from the large roundabout will be surrounded by three blocks of houses and the factory on the end of the road will be demolished and replaced with a school, so the residents do not have to go all the way to the town.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, a spacious playground will be constructed between the

Submitted by julykryuchkova on Fri Feb 02 2024

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words area with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

▼

5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

232 words

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The line graph below gives information about the percentage of women aged 15-64 in employment between 2003 and 2009.

In the past, when students did a university degree, they tended to study in their own country. Nowadays, they have more opportunity to study abroad. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development?

*Today, more and more students are deciding to move to another country for their studies. Do you think this is a good or bad idea?

Some children spend hours every day on smartphones. Why is this the case ? Do you think this is positive or negative development?

In many countries around the world , rural people are moving to cities ,so the population in the country side is decreasing Do you think it is a positive or a negative development

Computer and AI technology are increasingly being used for online education. Can artificial intelligence enhance the learning experience? Is this a positive or negative development?