IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The charts below show the qualifications of staff in an advertising company in 1990 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the qualifications of staff in an advertising company in 1990 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The given
piecharts
Correct your spelling
pie charts
show examples
 illustrate the changes in the employees' background degrees in a Canadian advertising company Between 1990 and 2010. Units are measured in percentages.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can clearly be seen that the Social
Science
Use synonyms
 and Arts degrees still the majority throughout the given period
while
Linking Words
 some others experienced both positive and negative growth.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the number of staff was drastically drown. In terms of
te
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
 qualification degree in 1990, Social
Science
Use synonyms
 and Arts, Administration and
Science
Use synonyms
, Maths, and Computers were the majors and each of them accounted for respectively 20%, 19% and 18%.
While
Linking Words
 other criteria
such
Linking Words
 as Engineering, Humanities, Nursing, MBA and others made up below 10%. The ages spread from 25 to 35 with a total of 515,600 employees. Regarding the background degree in 2010, Social
Science
Use synonyms
 and Arts degrees are still dominant with
Correct article usage
a slightly
show examples
slightly
Change the adverb
slight
show examples
 increase to 21%. Both Administration and Education experienced a bit decrease around 2-4% each. Staff with an Engineering background had a dramatic growth to 19% and became second the most. On the other side,
Science
Use synonyms
, Maths, and Computers witnessed a significant decline to just one-tenth.
However
Linking Words
, the total staff numbers
also
Linking Words
 experienced negative growth by almost half with ages between 45 and 55.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words science with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Qualifications
  • Advertising company
  • Staff composition
  • High school diploma
  • Bachelor's degree
  • Postgraduate degree
  • Proportion
  • Percentage
  • Trend
  • Decade
  • Workforce
  • Educational qualifications
  • Shift in qualifications
  • Implications
What to do next:
Look at other essays: