The graphs below show that post-school qualifications held by Canadians in the age groups 25 to 35 and 45 to 55.

The graphs below show that post-school qualifications held by Canadians in the age groups 25 to 35 and 45 to 55.
The pie charts illustrate degree holders who related to two
age
categories
whom
Change the pronoun
who
show examples
studied different fields in schools in Canada.
Overall
, most of the Canadians who are attributed to
age
25-35, studied social
science
and
arts
at their schools
while
many natives who related to the
age
category of 45 - 55 , learned social
science
and
arts
. With regards to the
age
of 25 -35 , natives who learned social
science
and
arts
at 20%, followed by administration
19
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at 19
show examples
%,
science
, maths computers
18
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at 18
show examples
% ,
education
Correct word choice
and education
show examples
and engineering
15
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at 15
show examples
% and 9% respectively.
Moreover
,
people
who studied humanities and nursing
4
Add a missing verb
were 4
show examples
% and 7% respectively. MBA holders are 6% and 2%
holds
Correct subject-verb agreement
hold
show examples
other
qulaification
Correct your spelling
qualification
qualifications
which is not surveyed.
On the other hand
,
people
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for people
show examples
who
belongs
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belong
show examples
to the
age
of 45-55 , 21% of
people
mastered social
science
and
arts
whereas
19% and 15% of
people
came from engineering and administration fields.
Furthermore
, it can be noticeable that a fourth
related
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is related
show examples
to both education and nursing fields.
People
who followed
scienced
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science
show examples
, maths,
computers
Correct word choice
and computers
show examples
at
10%.followed
Correct your spelling
10 %.followed
by humanities
5
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at 5
show examples
%. When it comes to MBA holders and other
qulaifications
Correct your spelling
qualifications
, it seemed 3% each.
Submitted by Praslah on

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words age, science, arts, people with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • post-secondary education
  • vocational training
  • bachelor's degree
  • master's degree
  • doctorate
  • diploma
  • certificate
  • professional designation
  • full-time education
  • part-time study
  • apprenticeship
  • continuing education
  • adult learning
  • educational attainment
  • workforce qualifications
  • demographic breakdown
  • socio-economic factors
  • statistical analysis
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