IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The line chart below shows the employment in the agricultural sector in four African countries (Nigeria, Kenya, South Africa, and Algeria) from 1985 to 2019. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The line chart below shows the employment in the agricultural sector in four African countries (Nigeria, Kenya, South Africa, and Algeria) from 1985 to 2019. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The provided chart gives information about the percentage of
staffs
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staff
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 employed in the sector of agriculture in four different regions in Africa between 1985 and 2019.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that all countries experienced a trend variation, where there was a small fluctuation
of
Change preposition
in
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 the
employement
Correct your spelling
employment
unemployment
 rate in Algeria.
In addition
Linking Words
, despite an up and down figure, Nigeria dominated the number of
worker
Change to a plural noun
workers
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 hired, followed by Kenya, South Africa, and Algeria respectively.
First,
Linking Words
Nigeria the ratio of employment in Nigeria comprised 30% in 1985 and made a significant rise to its peak in 2000, which was responsible for 45%. It
then
Linking Words
 went down gradually to 25%
in
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at
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 the end of
given
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a given
the given
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 year.
Similarly
Linking Words
, the working rate in Kenya started below 30% in 1985 before it grew
up
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apply
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to its highest position, which
wa
Correct your spelling
was
 just over 40% after a decade. After that, the trend steadily fell to its
lowel
Correct your spelling
low
 level, which made for not more than 25% in 2019. South
africa
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Africa
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 had 25% of staff employment
in
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at
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 the beginning of
examined
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the examined
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 period,
then
Linking Words
 rose to more than 30% in 1995, marking it as its biggest ratio, and started to decrease remarkably until it
stop
Wrong verb form
stopped
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 at just over 15% in 2019.
Lastly
Linking Words
, Algeria experienced a downward trend
eventhough
Correct your spelling
even though
 there was a small fluctuation. The country had
20
Correct article usage
a 20
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% ratio of employment in 1985 and slightly increased to 22% in 5 years
,
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apply
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 before it fell down to just over 15% in 2000. After that, it began to rise and fell
down
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apply
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to less than 15%
in
Change the preposition
at
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 the end of
given
Correct article usage
the given
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 time.

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "gives" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "fell" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "rise" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "just over" was used 3 times.
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