IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

You bought a microwave but when you got home, you discovered it did not work. You have called customer service but the matter has not been dealt with yet. Write a letter to the company and in your letter; *introduce youself *explain the problem *state what action you would like from the company

Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing in order to complain about a microwave that I bought
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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last
Linking Words
 week in your company. I am Sardor. I bought
this
Linking Words
 microwave from your store in order to heat some
my
Change preposition
of my
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 meals. In my opinion, It must be
17-March
Correct your spelling
17 March
 in the afternoon.
Thw
Correct your spelling
The
 first thing I would like to draw your attention to is your product. It has many malfunctions and some
defectives
Correct your spelling
defects
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. So that I am disappointed with
quality
Add an article
the quality
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 of your products. And I discovered it did not work When I got
my
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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home and I endavoured your item.
This
Linking Words
 is because it
does
Verb problem
is
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 not inadequate.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
However,
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 I have called customer service.
Although
Linking Words
 I called, they did not answer my call. So my problem has not been handling
this
Linking Words
. In short, to resolve
matter
Correct determiner usage
this matter
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 I kindly request that you
are refunding
Wrong verb form
refund
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 or
replacement to
Replace the word
replace
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 me. For me, I would be grateful in the event of you could give me a full refund. I look forward to your reply and a resolution to my problem.
Correct the word
Yours
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Your
Correct your spelling
Yours
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 faithfully, Ashurov Sardor.

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task achievement
Ensure that your introduction is clear and concise, directly addressing the issue at hand for a stronger task response.
task achievement
Avoid using subjective opinions without explanation, such as "It must be 17-March in the afternoon." Clarify statements for a complete response.
coherence cohesion
Use clear and logical transitions between paragraphs for improved coherence. Consider employing connectors like "Firstly," "Additionally," and "In conclusion," to guide the reader smoothly through your argument.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph should focus on a single issue for clarity and cohesion. Ensure that your letter has a consistent flow from introduction, through explanation of the problem, to the requested resolution.
coherence cohesion
To enhance the logical structure, start with a brief introduction stating the purpose of the letter, followed by paragraphs detailing the issue, your attempts to resolve it, and your request for resolution.
coherence cohesion
Use a more formal sign-off, such as "Yours sincerely" when you know the recipient's name or "Yours faithfully" when you do not, followed by a comma.
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