IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

The bar chart shows the percentage of people who ate at least five portions of fruit and vegetables per day in the UK from 2001-2008. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart shows the percentage of people who ate at least five portions of fruit and vegetables per day in the UK from 2001-2008. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#bar #percentage #people #five #portions #fruit #vegetables #uk #information #features #comparisons
Part 1
Given the
Change preposition
The
show examples
 bar chart demonstrates the percentages of consumption of five different fruits and vegetables by
children
,
men
 and
women
 in the years
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
2001 and 2008.
Overall
, it is evident from the chart that
consumption
Correct article usage
the consumption
show examples
 of
women
 throughout the period had the upper hand over
men
 and
children
. From 2001 to 2006, we can observe that, the percentage of
women
 who ate these five distinct types of fruits and vegetables increased from approximately 23 to 35 percent. By 2008, there was a decrease in
women
's consumption with
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 percentage of 30. For the first three years, the percentage of
men
 and
children
 stayed stagnant at around 13% and 18% respectively. From 2004 to 2007, there was a steady increase in the number of
men
 and
children
 who ate fruits and vegetables.
However
, there was a minor drop in 2008. It was just about 2
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in
case
Correct article usage
the case
show examples
 of
men
 and around 4
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in
children
's cases. (157 words)
Submitted by g4832525 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words children, men, women with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the first paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: