The most important factor in job satisfaction is salary To What extend do you agree or disagree?

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Having a
job
Use synonyms
with
a
Correct article usage
apply
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good pay plays a role
for
Change preposition
in
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job
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satisfaction.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
is not the most important element. I
am totally disagree
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totally disagree
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and in
this
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essay
Add a comma
essay,
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I will explore various dimensions of the issue and provide
analysis
Correct article usage
an analysis
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of the extent. First of
all
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all,
show examples
we build our
life
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based on happiness unfortunately happiness can not buy. But thanks to science
that
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apply
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we have knowledge about which hormones help us to be happy called dopamine. Our frontal brain
generate
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generates
show examples
this
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hormone based on our
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life style
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
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and
action
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actions
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such
Linking Words
as a reward. That’s why our adrenaline and being well situation are higher after
do
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doing
show examples
sports,
exercise
Correct word choice
and exercise
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. Even though we have a good
salary
Use synonyms
but
not
Add a missing verb
are not
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content
about
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with
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our
job
Use synonyms
it will
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
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us negatively.
For
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example
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example,
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I was working
an
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as an
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expat in China with a good employee package but I quit my
job
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because of not satisfied
about
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with
show examples
what I
were
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was
show examples
doing in
company
Add an article
the company
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.
Hence
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, if people are not happy regarding their occupation in
work place
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the workplace
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salary
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will not help them to be satisfied. Another reason why I disagree
that
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is that
show examples
personal improvement is very important in our
life
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. Imagine you are doing
Correct article usage
a descent
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descent
Correct your spelling
decent
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routine
job
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everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
and can not build new skills
enhance
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to enhance
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your vision, beyond the advancement of new technologies
eventhough
Correct your spelling
even though
at the end
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of the month
get
Wrong verb form
getting
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a nice payment from the company employee will stuck that
job
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and
salary
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will not help for
further
Linking Words
life
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development. People who
works
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work
show examples
in
factory
Add an article
a factory
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and just
checking
Wrong verb form
check
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same
Correct article usage
the same
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part quality over and over
I do not
Verb problem
cannot
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feel that they can continue like
this
Linking Words
until get retire. In
Conclusion
Add a comma
Conclusion,
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I will argue that personal satisfaction being
a
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apply
show examples
well and loving what you are doing in
company
Add an article
the company
a company
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are much more important than the
salary
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.
Salary
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is not the most important part
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
our
job
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by askinfirataskin on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure your essay has a clear, logical structure. Introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion should be distinct and lead smoothly into each other.
coherence cohesion
Use a variety of linking words to improve flow and cohesion between sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
Address the prompt fully and make your position clear throughout the essay. It seems your disagreement with the statement is made clear. Keep reinforcing your stance with examples and reasoning in all parts of your essay
task achievement
Develop your examples more fully to better support your main points. Include specific details and explain how these examples support your argument to enhance your task achievement score.
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